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WWE WrestleMania 21: WrestleMania Goes Hollywood
by Scrooge McSuck

- A 30-Man Battle Royale is featured on the DVD, but it's a clusterfuck that goes too long. Booker T wins for those who care, surviving the double teaming of Chris Masters and Viscera. Big whoop.

- Opening video includes highlights of the vignettes of WWE Superstars imitating various classic films, such as Pulp Fiction, Forest Gump, Dirty Hairy, among others. Then we get a fresh one of Gladiator, starring "Stone Cold" Steve Austin.

- Commentary for the Raw matches is Jim Ross and Jerry Lawler, and for Smackdown it's Michael Cole and Tazz. And for the two of you who care, it's Hugo Savinovich and Carlos Cabrera doing spanish commentary, a feature on the WM 21 DVD.

- Opening Match:
Rey Mysterio vs. Eddie Guerrero:

They are the reigning Smackdown Tag Team Champions, having beat the Basham Brothers at No Way Out the month previous. Yes, the TAG CHAMPS are wrestling each other in the opening match. No feud, but this would lead to some great matches throughout 2005 that ended up being over-shadowed by the involvment of Rey's son Dominik. At least we got the "Who's Your Papi?" shirt. I should point out Rey Mysterio has a unique costume for the match... prematch that is, wearing a jump-suit with patterns of the united states and mexican flag printed across it. Also, and most importantly, because of his mask, which is quite odd, as there's no back to it, he's constantly struggling to keep it on throughout the match, messing up spots in the process. They manage to put on a good wrestling match, but a lot of the spots looked a bit awkward with Rey constantly adjusting his mask, and the match not given enough time to develope anything, despite being at WRESTLEMANIA. Late in the match, Guerrero with the Three Amigos. He tries a Alambama Slam, but Rey adjusts his mask before countering with a head scissors. Guerrero comes back with a back breaker for a two count, looking frustrated in the process. Guerrero with more suplexes, but the Frog Splash misses! I can't tell, but it looks like Rey busted his lip. Rey with a mahistral cradle, but Eddie counters for a two count. Rey with boots to the chest, and a hurricanrana attempt is blocked. Drop toe hold, and the 619 connects! Springboard hurricantana is blocked with a powerbomb, but it only gets a two count! Eddie tries another back breaker, but Rey counters with a hurricanrana for the three count at 12:39. A really hot last few minutes saves this from being mediocre. If not for Rey's constant wardrobe malfunctions, they could've had a much better time, even with just 12-minutes. Remember, their Halloween Havoc '97 match was pretty much the same length. Afterwards, they shake hands because they're good friends. Yes, they are. (***)

- Money in the Bank Ladder Match:
Chris Jericho vs. Chris Benoit vs. Christian (w/ Tyson Tomko) vs. Shelton Benjamin vs. Edge vs. Kane:

Damn, there's a lot of Canadians in this match. For the third time, Edge and Christian are wrestling in ladder matches at a WrestleMania, both TLC matches, and both won. Kane's pyro lights a shit load of ladders near the entrance on fire, in a nice little visual. Hopefully his performance here is better than the WM XX suck-fest with the Undertaker. Kane nails Edge on his way to the ring, then everyone goes for him, without much success. Kane power walks to the ring, but Edge follows to prevent any ladder finding. Benoit and Shelton with a double suplex on Kane, on the floor. Christian pulls a ladder into the ring, but Jericho see-saws it up into his face. Was Jericho heel or face here? Benjamin in the ring, and he hammers away in the corner on Jericho. Whip into the corner is reversed, and Jericho with the bulldog. Springboard dropkick knocks both Edge and Benoit off the apron, and follows with a pescado to Edge. Christian to the turnbuckle, and a springboard plancha onto the pile. Benjamin's turn, and it's a no-hands senton! Kane to the top rope, and he jumps into the pile himself. Monkey see, monkey do, I always say. Kane tosses a ladder into the ring, and bashes Edge with it. Christian jumps off the top rope, into it as well. Jericho with a missile dropkick into the ladder, knocked back into the face of Kane. Shelton gets a piece of ladder, and Jericho uses it as a battering ram. Jericho bashes Edge in the chest with it, then slams it down on him. Benoit from behind with a German suplex, and the ladder goes flying out of the ring! The ladder is brought back into play, but Kane goozles Benoit. Benoit counters a chokeslam and applies a Crippler Crossface. Edge breaks it, and gets locked in the hold himself. Kane with the ladder, and he rams Benoit in the face with it. Benoit gets his arm caught in the ladder, and Kane makes a sandwich of it. Edge comes back with a spear to Kane, and here's Christian with a second ladder. Con-Ladder-To to Kane! Benjamin springboards in with a double clothesline to E&C. Christian with the Dragon Whip into a ladder, into Christian! Edge sets a ladder up in the corner, and whips Benjamin into the piece of steel. Edge sets up for a Spear, but gets flap jacked onto it instead. "Shelton" chant picks up as everyone is laying around dead. Benjamin rams the back of Edge's head against the ladder, and the Stinger Splash connects! Benjamin with a slow crawl up the ladder, but here's Jericho to interrupt the proceedings. Christian sets up a ladder next to Benjamin and climbs up as well. Here's Benoit to climb too. Edge with a third ladder, and he's climbing! Everyone exchanges blows... Christian single arm DDT's Benoit off Ladder 1, Jericho gets knocked off Ladder 2 By Benjamin, and Edge hammers away on Benjamin on the other. Benjamin with the T-Bone suplex from the ladder! Jericho dumps the ladder over, landing on Benjamin and Edge. Christian sets up a ladder on the rung of another ladder, but gets rammed into it for his trouble. Jericho climbs... and Benjamin RUNS UP the other ladder, and knocks Jericho off with a clothesline! Spot of the Year! Benjamin with his climbing now, but Christian knocks him in the chest with the ladder. Kane is back, and he boots Christian down. CHOKESLAM TO SHELTON, and he catchers his leg in the ropes, getting tied up in the process. Tomko runs in to nail Kane, and sets up ladder to help Christian go for the briefcase. NO DICE! Kane is back to his feet, and he sends Tomko over the top rope. Kane climbs up the ladder to stop Christian, but is knocked off... so Kane does the easy thing, and dumps the ladder over, causing Christian to spill out of the ring, onto Tomko! Kane rearranges some furniture now. Jericho returns to prevent Kane from winning. The ladder tilts over, and both men get dropped across the top rope, but Kane manages to remain in the ring. Benoit returns with ANOTHER ladder, selling an arm injury from the spot earlier in the match. Benoit climbs up the ladder in the corner for a diving headbutt to Kane! Benoit looks to have busted his stitches open on the impact, too! That was pretty fucking nasty. Benoit climbs up again, and Kane sits up! Kane climbs up and goozles Benoit, but Benoit knocks him off with a series of headbutts and forrearms. Benoit is up... and Edge is in, nailing Benoit in the arm with a wicked chair shot! Edge climbs the ladder, and he grabs the briefcase for the victory at 15:17, increasing his WrestleMania record to 4-0 in the process, and winning his third WrestleMania ladder match. Great spot-fest fun, with everyone doing their role perfectly. Since there was an obvious weak link in the match (Kane), he was limited to what he could do, rather than try and keep up with everyone for the entire match. Benjamin stole the show though, with that insane run-up-the-ladder. Probably the best ladder match in years, thanks to a fresh batch of spots. (****1/2)

- Eugene comes out to talk, and he's quickly interrupted by Muhammad Hassan-Chop and Daivari, who are pissed for not being booked in a WrestleMania match. They attack Eugene, and if anyone didn't see it coming, HULK HOGAN makes his return, cleaning house of the evil sand monkies, and doing his pose-down for about 10-minutes. Waste of time, but the crowd was into most of it, at least. The crowd asked for it at the Hall of Fame induction, remember.

- The Undertaker vs. Randy Orton:
It's the Legend vs. Legend Killer Match! Undertaker's record at WrestleMania was 12-0 at this point, for those who forgot how to count that high. One memorable moment for this build up was Kane stalking Orton backstage about not understanding the Undertaker's powers... yeah, that went nowhere. Orton also leading up to the match, RKO'ed Stacy Keibler, breaking up a TV relationship that lasted all of two weeks. I guess that makes him the heel, even though he was face for most of the build up. The usual goofy Undertaker entrance that we've seen a hundred times already. Orton with a bitch slap to start. Undertaker with a side headlock applied. Irish whip, and Orton with a dropkick for a one count. Irish whip, and Orton with a back body drop. Undertaker returns the favor with a roundhouse right, with Orton over-selling it in the corner. Undertaker follows in with his slugging offense. Orton woith a surprise roll up for a two count. RKO attempt, but Undertaker dumps him over the top rope. Undertaker follows outside, and drops a leg across the throat of Orton from the apron. Back in the ring, and Undertaker goes old school... but Orton kinda blows it by landing too soon. Undertaker charges to the corner, but crotches himself going for a boot. Orton with a dropkick sends Undertaker off the apron and into the security wall. Orton follows out with his "yow" punches. They're like Triple H's "douche" punches, buit not quite. Back in the ring, and Orton continues to bring the punishment. Undertaker mounts a brief comeback, but Orton puts him down with a clothesline for a two count. Irish whip, and Undertaker comes back with his signature DDT for a two count. Whip into the corner, and Undertaker with a side suplex (stop stealing Kane's moves!) for another two count. Undertaker rams Orton into the buckle, and charges in with a clothesline. Whip across the ring, and Undertaker with a snake eyes. Orton blocks most of the impact and comes back with a diving back elbow for a two count. Orton with a series of forearms across the chest of Undertaker, but plays to the crowd too much, allowing the Undertaker to sit up. Orton continues to hammer away on 'Taker with rights, but 'Taker comes back with some of his own. Irish whip is reversed, and Undertaker gets the best of a double clothesline, and covers for a two count. Undertaker turns MMA by applying a Dragon Sleeper. Orton counters from the hold and plants Undertaker with a quick DDT for a two count. Reverse chinlock applied by Orton. Undertaker fights out of that, but now Orton catches Undertaker off the ropes in a sleeper hold. Undertaker escapes that too, taking Orton down with a back suplex. Orton charges into the boot of the Undertaker, but catches Undertaker with a powerslam for another two count. Orton with mounted punches in the corner (9), but Undertaker comes out trying for the Last Ride. Orton escapes and tries an RKO, but Undertaker pushes him into the referee. Last Ride attempt #2... looks botched. Bob Orton runs in and nails Undertaker with his cast! He rolls Randy onto the Undertaker, but it's only for a two count! Undertaker sits up, and Randy's fucked. Undertaker with a series of rights, then boots Bob off the apron. Randy counters a chokeslam with the RKO! That only gets a two count! Orton calls for a TOMBSTONE, but that's not gonna happen. Undertaker counters from Orton's attempt, and plants Orton with the Tombstone himself, and that's enough for the three count at 14:13 to increase his WrestleMania record to 13-0. To my surprise, Randy Orton busted his ass here to make something of the match, while the Undertaker was doing his usual 'self. Nice booking to have Orton try to win without cheating, then resorting to his father's help late in the match when he looked done. Hot finish too. (***)

- WWE Women's Championship Match:
Trish Stratus © vs. Christy Hemme (w/ Lita):

Yes, this is on a WrestleMania card. I should also note "evil bitch" Trish was fucking awesome. Too bad they turned her face after she came back from an injury. For whatever reason, WWE dubbed over Christy's crappy theme with a generic crappy theme. Excuse me while I slack off for this one. Trish has some interesting "tights" on for this match, I guess continuing her tradition of unique tights at WrestleMania. Trish offers Christy to cover her to start, then shoves her down. Trish avoids a lock u[p and boots Christy out of the ring, then throws her into the steps. That looked awful. Back in the ring, and Trish continues toying with the bitch. "We Want Matt" chant, I think I hear. Trish mocks Christy to a babyface pop. Low-blow... wait, how is that worked in a women's match? Trish with chops in the corner and mouthing off to Lita. Chirsty with a sloppy sunset flip for a two count. Trish with a SPEAR, and gives herself a pat on the back. Hey, stop stealing Barry Horowitz's spot. Trish countinues to mouth off to Hemme as she wipes the floor with her. Back in the ring, and Hemme with a surprise roll up for a two count. Hemme kicks the leg from under Trish's leg. Trish eats buckle... I said BUCKLE, and Hemme continues doing nothing more than the most basic stuff. Ugly reverse twist of fate gets a two count. They trade roll ups for two counts, and Trish nails the Chick Kick for the three count at 4:11. Trish's heel tactics made this watchable, but the wrestling sucked major ass. (1/2*)

- Shawn Michaels vs. Kurt Angle:.
Oh no, I forgot this was WrestleMania 21, not 22. Fuck me in the ass... not literally. Oh well, I guess I can make fun of Michaels more now. Leading up to the show, Angle promised to do what Shawn did in his career, including beating up Marty Jannetty on Smackdown, singing "sexy boy" with the Sensational Sherri before beating her up, and some other stuff I forgot. Shawn starts with a slap, and Angle goes for a double leg take down and waistlock. Angle rolls around the ring with the waistlock, and Shawn does his best to escape, finally grabbing the ropes like a punk bitch. "You Screwed Bret" chants. Shawn with a side headlock takeover. Angle fights back to his feet, but Shawn keeps the hold applied. Angle with a back suplex, and Shawn is still holding on. Angle finally escapes, but Shawn puts him down with a shoulder block and applies another headlock. Escape in the corner, and Angle gives a clean break. Angle with a waistlock, but Shawn counters and goes back to the headlock. Angle with another waistlock and elbow to the side of the head. Angle with a shoulder block, but Shawn comes back with a hip toss and applies a short-arm scissors. They trade two counts while the hold remains applied. Angle powers up with Shawn on his shoulder, and Shawn counters with a sunset flip for a two count. Shawn with a backslide for another two count, then goes to the headlock again. I think Shawn knows how to do a side headlock. Angle hammers away in the corner, and Shawn with some of the same. Angle with a sucker punch, and the ankle lock applied! Shawn escapes and a clothesline takes both men out of the ring. Shaen undoes the Smackdown announce table, but then wonders What Would Jesus Do? Angle with a hard forearm to break Shawn's momentum, but Shawn comes back with chops. Angle ducks a clothesline, and he Angle Slams Shawn back first into the ring post! Angle appears to have tripped on the piece of table lying there, too. Angle heads back out and hammers away on the back of Shawn. Back in the ring, and Angle with a suplex for a two count. Angle with a body scissors applied, the some hair pulling for the hell of it. Face grinding Angle makes me like him again. Dueling "Let's Go" chants. Shawn chops in the corner, but gets whipped into the corner, and Angle takes him down with a overhead belly-to-belly suplex. Angle with another belly-to-belly for a two count. Angle with a knee into the lower back of Shawn to go along with a chinlock. Michaels battles back up to his feet and hammers on the midsection of Angle to escape. CHOP CITY! They slug it out until Shawn slaps him. Angle snaps and decapitates him with a clothesline for a two count. Only women slap, I might point out. Hence only Shawn and Orton are the only ones to do it on this show. Angle sets Shawn up on ther top turnbuckle, but Shawn fights him off. Shawn to the top rope, and he misses an elbow drop! The straps are down! Shawn counters the Angle Slam with a hip toss, then back drops Angle over the top rope. Shawn to the top rope, and he comes off with a cross body to the floor! Angle tries to german suplex Shawn off the apron. Shawn seems a bit too comfortable in that position though, and holds onto the ropes. Shawn with elbows to the siude of the head, followed by a mule kick to the balls. The crowd boos that, despite Shawn being the babyface. Shawn boots Angle onto the table, and springboards off the ropes onto Angle... and the table doesn't break! Yeah, Shawn weighs 240 pounds my ass. A fucking break-away table wouldn't collapse under his weight. Both men... slowly... crawl back in the ring. Longest 10-seconds in recorded history. Angle has a REALLY fucking busted lip. Probably chipped some teeth, too. Shawn with rights and chops. Irish whip is reversed, and Shawn with the diving forearm. Shawn nips up, and turns into Hulk Hogan all of a sudden. Shawn with an inverted atomic drop and clothesline. Scoop slam, and Shawn comes off the top rope with an elbow drop. Shawn tunes up the band as I question how people claim only Bret's finishing set of moves was repetetive. Sweet Chin Music is blocked, and Angle applies the Ankle Lock! TAP YOU MOTHERFUCKING BITCH! TAP! Shawn tries rolling through, but Angle keeps the hold locked on. Shawn screams like Pat Patterson is riding him, but manages to grab the bottom rope to break the hold. Angle Slam attempt, but Shawn counters. Angle counters the counter, and applies another Ankle Lock. Shawn counters that with a sunset flip for a two count. Sweet Chin Music is blocked again, and now the Angle Slam connects! That only gets a two count. Angle heads to the top rope, but misses a moonsault! Well, he kinda caught his face on Shawn's stomach, but you get the point. Shawn rolled out of the way. Shawn climbs to the top rope again, but Anghle pops up for a SUPER ANGLE SLAM! That only gets a two count, too! Come on, Shawn should be fucking dead by now. Angle with more trash talking, so Shawn nails Sweet Chin Music out of nowhere! Shawn... slowly... crawls over... to cover... and Angle kicks out at 2.9999999995! Shawn is STILL covering Angle, by the way, without a count. Shawn looks like he's about to vomit as he slowly gets back to his feet. Angle is playing possum though, and hooks the Ankle Lock again! After a few attempts to escape, Shawn FINALLY taps out like the bitch he is at 27:25 as Angle grapevines the leg. All kidding aside at the expense of Shawn Michaels, a hell of a match. The first 5-minutes dragged major ass, but it was to drive home that Shawn was frustrating Angle with his own style. Then they went into a sports entertainment style match, with Angle dominating with his wrestling as well. Then finally, you had the super hot finish. My only complaint though, is that Shawn wouldn't tap out for like 2-minutes. Not the "OMG Greatest Match Ever" some people claim it to be, but it's up there for Top WrestleMania matches. (****)

- The WrestleMania Video for the imitation of "Basic Instinct" featuring Chris Jericho, Christian, Stacy Keibler, and others.

- Piper's Pit returns to WrestleMania, with Stone Cold Steve Austin. Carlito interrupts and gets his ass kicked, then Austin stunners Piper for fun. Waste of 15-minutes.

- Now it's the Taxi Driver mockery. Highlights include Big Show getting screwed over for all of his attempt, Batista oblivous to the "You Talkin' to me" line, Gene Snitsky stopping mid-line to comment a bag of cereal falling over not being his fault. Probably the best of the bunch.

- I'm not wasting 10 precious minutes talking about the sumo match between the Big Show and Akebono, a former Grand Champion (or "Yokozuna") of Sumo. The "match" lasts about a minute, with Akebono going over. Poor Big Show... jobs at WrestleMania in under a minute, and while wearing a Sumo thong.

- WWE Championship Match:
John Bradshaw Layfield © vs. John Cena:

I don't remember the exact backstory to this, but I remember JBL blowing up the stupid spinner version of the United States belt after helping ORLANDO JORDAN win it. JBL's entrance is complete with dollar bills falling from the roof with JBL's face printed on them. Before the match, JBL kisses the belt good bye, cause everyone knows he's not walking away from the show with it. Lockup to start, and JBL applies a side headlock. Irish whip to escape following a series of forearms, and JBL puts Cena down with a shoulder block. Criss-cross, and Cena with a shoulder tackle. Cena charges into the corner, but eats boot, and JBL puts Cena down again with a shoulder block. JBL hammers away on Cena with clubbing rights. Irish whip is reversed, and JBL pounds Cena down to the canvas. JBL with a swinging neck breaker, then a second for good measure for a two count. JBL chokes Cena cross the top rope, then pulls back on the head of Cena with the middle rope behind his neck. JBL clotheslines Cena between the middle and bottom ropes. Cena comes back with a series of rights, but runs into a spinebuster, APA style. JBL poses before covering for a two count. JBL with another neck breaker for a two count. JBL with a boot to the face, and Cena just rolls around doing nothing. Cena "snaps", but gets poked in the eyes. Whip into the corner, and JBL follows in with a stiff clothesline. JBL with a short-arm clothesline, but Cena's foot is on the ropes during the cover. JBL with a snapmare, followed by a diving forearm into the back. Irish whip, and JBL applies a sleeper hold. Cena staggers around drunkenly before escaping with a back suplex. Cena bounces off the ropes, and a double clothesline puts both men down. Slugfest time, until JBL uses the pants of Cena for leverage to send him out of the ring. JBL with another swinging neckbreaker on the outside. Back in the ring, and JBL covers for a two count. JBL sets Cena up on the top turnbuckle and beats him like a bitch. SUPER-PLEX! JBL covers, but it only gets a two count. JBL heads to the top rope, but Cena catches him coming off with a powerslam! Cena with a series of rights and clotheslines. Irish whip, and Cena with a back body drop. Irish whip, and Cena with a hip toss. Cena with a side slam, followed by the 5-Knuckle Shuffle. Cena pumps up his shoes, but runs into another big boot. Lariat time, but Cena ducks, and the F-U connects for the three count at 11:26, giving him his first "World Championship." Pretty dull match, and the crowd just didn't care. It also didn't help the finish that came out of nowhere, with no real build up like all the other matches on the show so far. (*1/2)

- For those who forgot, the WrestleMania Hall of Fame Induction for the Class of 2005 was the night earlier. The Legends were the Iron Shiek, Nikolai Volkoff, Bob Orton Jr., Mr. Wonderful Paul Orndorff (nice suit, Paul), Jimmy Hart, Roddy Piper, and Hulk Hogan. This wastes more time for the PPV, but there's only one match left.

- WWE Heavyweight Championship Match:
Triple H © (w/ Ric Flair) vs. Batista:

For the second time, Triple H comes to the ring with his music played live by Motorhead. Lemmy again mutters through the lines, as if he doesn't even know them. Lemmy, learn the fucking lines already. It's not the hardest song to fucking memorize. We're not asking you to sing November Rain or some other 10-minute song without warming up. Jesus... and why is the champion coming out FIRST again?! Batista still has his generic theme, and the crowd's pop was wasted on Trip's grand entrance. No pyro for Batista, either. Jesus, this is the MAIN EVENT. Give the man some fucking pyro! For once, the referee holds the big gold belt up the right way. Trash talking again before the match. Lockup to start, and they hold onto that for a while, with no one winning. Lockup #2 goes into the corner, and Batista shoves Trips off. HHH with a side headlock applied, and a shoulder block goes Batista's way. Trips with another side headlock applied, and this time Trips floors Batista with a shoulder block. Boot to the midsection, but Batista counters a pedigree and press slams Trips instead. Slugfest won by Batista. Whip across the ring, and HHH nails Batista with an elbow. Batista tosses Trips back into the corner and hammers away. Irish whip, and Batista with a back body drop. Irish whip, and Trips with a running high knee sends Batista out of the ring. Trips heads out and rams Batista into the steel steps. Back in the ring, and Trips drops an elbow across the back of the head of Batista. Stomping and choking by Triple H. Trips argues with the referee, allowing Flair to choke Batista with his coat. HHH rams the back of Batista into the security wall, then into the ring apron. Into the ring again, and Hunter drops a series of elbows and knees across the back. Hunter continues working over the lower back of Batista. Trips with a suplex for a two count, folowed by more pounding. Side back breaker by Triple H, and Flair with more cheap shots. Batista hammers on HHH from the apron, but gets stunned across the top rope. Back into the ring, and this match is dragging ass. Batista with a short offense burst, but Trips remains in control, and connects with a neck breaker for a two count. Pedigree attempt #2, but Batista back drops free this time. Irish whip, and Trips with a face buster for a two count. Trips heads to the top rope, and jumps right into a clothesline. Jim Ross saying Triple H and Batista have been together "day and night" is a little comical. Kinda' like when he said "Lita is jerking Trish off... the top rope." Anyway, Triple H is in control again. The action spills outside, where the ring steps become involved. Trips tries a pedigree on the steps, but Batista counters and sling shots him into the ring post for a blade job. I think he pulled a Shawn Michaels, doing the blade job mid-move so it wouldn't look as fake by hiding his face in his arms while doing it afterwards. Back in the ring, and Batista hammers away on the cut, and Trips is bleeding all over the place. It's raining blood as Trips crawls back up to his feet. Whip into the corner, and Batista follows in with a clothesline. Repeat. Trips blocks another attempt momentarily, so Batista pounds away on him instead. Trips whipped into the corner again, and Batista floors him with another clothesline. Running powerslam by Batista gets a two count. They head back out of the ring, and I'm assuming a table gets busted. In the mean time, Flair gets busted by Batista. Trips with a chair, but the referee runs interference. Batista tosses Trips back into the ring, and I'm bored out of my skull. Flair is in the ring with the title belt, but Batista gives him a spine buster. Trips has the belt now, and he cleans Batista's clock with it. The refere is back in, but that only gets a two count. Trips charges, but Batista catches him with a spine buster. Trips counters a powerbomb with a low blow. Pedigree attempt #4, bu Batista blocks it and powers out with a back drop/slam type manuever. Batista does his best Warrior impersonation, and gives Trips the thumbs down. BATISTA BOMB! Batista covers, and we have a NEW Champion at 21:34. Much like the last match, it just lacked excitement. The first half dragged majorly, and the last half was only saved with a few minor spots. Probably the most disappointing main event at WrestleMania since 13, in terms of match quality. (*1/2)

Final Thoughts: Things were going well for the first three hours, but then the Sumo Match happened, and the two world title matches failed to deliver in the star rating department. It also didn't help that Cena's win got a lukewarm reaction because of the random finish, and the main event was a slow version of Punchamania for the most part. Still, the Money in the Bank match, HBK/Angle, Rey/Eddie, and Taker/Orton is worth enough for a Strong Recommendation, but stop after HBK/Angle if you don't want to sit through an hour of boring wrestling.

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