WCW Halloween Havoc 2000
by Scrooge McSuck
- I would like to point out, that at this point, I had no knowledge of what WCW was doing. I didn't watch a WCW show all of 2000, and only watched one episode of Nitro before the final episode, so this is all new to me. I was hardcore into the WWF at the time, watching every show religiously (yes, even Sunday Night Heat, and even Jakked, if I was up late enough for it), and thus I didn't have time to care about what WCW was doing. I wasn't a smart fan, I didn't know who Vince Russo was, and I didn't have any idea WCW was going to be going out of business. I just cared about a good wrestling show, and WWF gave it to me every night, so that's all that mattered.
- Once again, we're coming to you live from the MGM Grand in Las Vegas, NV, originally broadcasted on October 29th, 2000. I don't know how different the attendance was compared to previous years, but the crowd looks noticably smaller here than it did in 1998, the latest Halloween Havoc from the same location that I've watched. I wouldn't be surprised if this crowd was papered, either.I find it laughable the sponsor for Halloween Havoc is... WCW Backstage Assault, from Electronic Arts. Um... yeah. I know the WWE had PPV's sponsored by their Smackdown vs. Raw series, but at least those were good games.
- Tony Schiavone, Mark Madden, and Stevie Ray are calling all the action. Ew. When Schiavone is your best option, circa 2000, it's going to be a long night.
WCW World Tag Team Championship Match:
Mark Jindrak & Sean O'Haire © vs. The Boogie Knights vs. The Filthy Animals:
We're shown a replay from a recent episode of Nitro, where the Boogies won the titles, but "Above Average" Mike Sanders, acting as authority figure of the month, ordered the match to continue, and thus allowing Jinkdrak and O'Haire to retain. Those finishes seemed to happen a lot in WCW. The Knights are Disco Inferno and a cue-ball Alex Wright, and it's Rey Jr. and Kidman representing the Animals. Alex Wright, 8 years later, was STILL doing that awful dance routine? I just want to say, before this starts, I HATE tag matches with three or more teams... except for those delightful TLC matches between E&C, the Dudleys, and Hardys. Wright attacks Jindrak before the bell, while Kidman stands in the corner and watches... so one member of each team is allowed at the same time? Jindrak gets worked over and dumped out of the ring. Wright nails Kidman with a clothesline, and drops a series of elbows. Kidman takes Wright over with a head scissors, and tags in Rey, who gets a low blow going for the gayest move in wrestling. Disco tags in, and quickly takes Rey down with a swinging neck breaker. Jindrak comes back in with a springboard clothesline on Disco and a tilt-o-whirl on Rey. O'Haire tags in and presses Rey into the air for a powerslam. O'Haire with some funky follow-through clotheslines to both men. Disco and Rey are double teaming O'Haire, and it's the beginning of the match all over, with new stars. Rey with the double-cross, but O'Haire breaks a pin attempt. O'Haire with the Michinoku Driver on Kidman, and a missile dropkick from Wright to O'Haire gets a two count. I'm sorry for giving up on PBP, but it's too hard to keep up with, not because it's great, but there's too much happening without any real rhythm behind it. All three teams get the hot tag, and O'Haire gets lost in the moment. Rey with a basement dropkick and springboard leg drop. O'Haire dumps Rey out of the ring and puts the boots to Disco. The action spills outside, and the champs double hip toss Kidman back INTO the ring? I've never seen that. Jindrak then press slams Rey into Wright for a powerslam, and that gets a two count. Wright with a plancha on Jindrak. Back inside, and Rey takes O'Haire over the top with a hurricanrana. More stuff happens. Jindrak press slams Rey over the top rope onto Wright. Disco with the Stunner on Jindrak, but Rey breaks it with a leg drop. O'Haire with a senton bomb on Disco, and the three count is made at 10:08. After the match, Wright beats on Rey Jr. with a chair... why? Konnan tries making the save, but gets stomped out for it, and then finally Sgt. AWOL scares everyone off... who? Match was good, but a pain in the ass to keep up with at times. After about 5-seconds of caring, I realized AWOL is The Wall (duh), and later known as Malice in TNA.
- WCW Hardcore Championship Match:
Reno © vs. Sgt. AWOL:
I have no idea who Reno is, and I honestly don't care. We go back to October 2nd, 2000, when, you guessed it, Sgt. AWOL was screwed over by Mike Sanders. We get a table spot 15-seconds into the match, and it only gets a two count. Way to build up to it. WCW has reinstated the Hardcore Rules for the Hardcore Title Match... um... why would you have a HARDCORE TITLE without Hardcore Rules? That's like having an ECW show and saying specific matches were "Extreme Rules." Reno with a kendo stick and garbage can shots for a two count. At the same time in WWF, Steve Blackman was doing the "I don't need to use weapons" thing to be a Hardcore Champion, and I thought it was pretty cool. AWOL smashes a stick on Reno, causing Madden to say it was like a Derek Jeter home run... A DEREK JETER HOME RUN? Um... WHY WOULD YOU SAY DEREK JETER?!?! That's like saying a "Juan Pierre" home run, unless you were being ironic, because he never hits them, but that line was said with complete conviction for sincerity! The trash can gets abused as much as it was by the Barbarian and Brute Force on that I-Generation PPV. This match is making me want to watch a Stevie Ray match. The "action" goes up the ramp, and Reno goes low on AWOL, who has him goozled. Reno with a Dragon sleeper into a face-buster, but doesn't cover. Stupid. Here comes another table. Wow, its only been 4 minutes since one was used. I'm SO excited to see another table spot. Reno pulls out the other one, and WCW should've used the bubblegum sponsor (for double your pleasure) over this... oh my GOD, they actually PUT THE SPONSOR OVER THE SPOT, but it's still Backstage Assault. Wow... I didn't expect WCW to do something that stupid, and should kick myself for NOT expecting it. They wander backstage (where's the Backstage Assault pimping now?), and Mark Madden uses the term "Old School Hardcore" for the 652th time. Another table spot. That's three. It's even less cool each time, since blowing their wad doing one FOR THE FIRST SPOT OF THE MATCH. Hey, guess what... another table spot. Madden takes a shot at the Internet as this match sadly must continue. Back to the ramp, and Reno does what I used to do in 3rd grade... throw myself down a hill to see how much I can roll. AWOL pulls out another fucking table from under the ring. I guess he's winded doing nothing but walking. Reno does the same face buster move onto the table, and it's finally over at 10:57. Who gave the green-light to give this match more than three minutes? Absolute crap. Stuff happens, Chuck Palumbo and some other guy come out, then Chavo and Lash LeRoux come out... and we lead into...
- A backstage segment, where Chuck Palumbo, who we just saw in his trunks, WEARING HIS STREET CLOTHES, congratulating Jindrak and O'Haire for retaining the titles?!?
Chavo Guerrero & Lash LeRoux vs. Chuck Palumbo & Shawn Stasiak:
Don't you love "Impromptu" booked matches on one of the biggest PPV's of the year? Makes it feel that much more important. I know Lash and Chavo have goofy names, but fuck that, I refuse to go with them. Palumbo must have a magic dressing room... we saw him 5 minutes ago in his tights, then all dressed up, and now he's back out in his trunks again. Did someone rip off Supermans phone booth for the WCW roster? Stasiak wanting to be the next Mr. Perfect is better than being "Meat" I guess. If you don't understand that one, then be thankful, I'm not explaining it. The MIA charge the ring and get pounded. Stasiak gets singled out and double teamed. Irish whip, and Chavo connects with a clothesline. Stasiak fights back, as I fight constantly typing "Jinrak" instead of "Stasiak" every time. Palumbo tags in and gets taken over with an arm drag. LeRoux in with a lame elbow drop, followed by a a snap suplex for a two count. If Palumbo and Stasiak weren't expecting to wrestle, why did they run to the ring earlier in the night, IN THEIR WRESTLING ATTIRE? In the NBA, when you're not selected to be on the 12-man roster, you don't dress out. In boxing, if you're not on the card, you don't put on the trunks and gloves... whatever, it's just horrible wrestling logic... hey, WCW Backstage Assault will be available on December 12th for the Nintendo 64 and Playstation... ONE! Jindrak with a sit-out powerbomb, and Palumbo with a Scott Hall-style fallaway slam. Chavo is too much of a Jobber to NOT be dead after both moves. Overhead belly-to-belly from Palumbo for a two count. I noticed I accidentally typed Jindrak again, but fuck it, I'm leaving it this time. Stuff happens, we get a big brawl between everyone involved. Palumbo keeps looking over his shoulder waiting for the spot, and Schiavone actually mentions Palumbo doing this, and guess what.... it's heel miscommuncation, and Chavo pins STASIAK, not Jindrak, at 9:37. Horribly boring, complete with bad commentary.Shane Douglas & Torrie Wilson vs. Konnan & Tygress:
For whatever reason, Torrie Wilson is dressed as Wonder Woman. Tygress comes out, since Konnan is still selling the horrible beating from earlier in the night. Wasn't Tygress one of the secretaries on Spin City? Torrie throws her down to start, but gets thrown to the ground trying to follow up. Tygress with THE WORST KICKS AND STOMPS IN THE HISTORY OF WRESTLING. Douglas pulls her down by the hair, making him my favorite wrestler ever. Douglas stomps away on her, and Torrie adds some pretty awful kicks herself. Konnan misses his cue, and gets stomped on by Douglas, as he makes the "save." Konnan with a double clothesline, and I guess a bad Konnan vs. Douglas match is better than the women attemtping to "entertain." WHY IS SHANE DOUGLAS SELLING FOR A WOMAN?!? My God, this show is just awful, and I'm not even through the first hour. This match defines all logic. Konnan beating up Douglas, with the help of the valet, is ok, but having her, ALONE IN THE RING, WORKING HIM OVER!?? COME THE FUCK ON!!! Douglas wrestles himself for a few more moments before punching her in the face, and I find it hilarious. Torrie tags in, and it's downhill, if that's even possible, from here. Tygress boots Torrie coming in (selling a shot to the boobs, despite being hit low near the crotch) and hits a sucky X-Factor, but that only gets two. The "heels" control more, but I say "Heels" because I think any decent fan of wrestling appreciates Douglas beating up on a non-wrestling valet. Douglas with a Camel Clutch, and then the Chicken-Wing, but Tygress counters(!!!!), and tags out to Konnan. Irish whip and a back drop, followed by a snapmare and basement dropkick from Konnan. The DDT connects, but only gets a two count. The woman embarrass the sport even more, and you can clearly see Shane Douglas call a spot, signalling with his hands to someone to get into position. Suddenly, the action, and I use that term loosely, comes to a complete stop for roughly ten seconds, then suddenly, Torrie gives a reverse Stunner to Konnan, but Tygress breaks the pin attempt. Then the match keeps going until an X-Factor from Konnan ends it at 8:41. EW. Quite possibly one of the worst matches I've ever seen. Just read the whole match, blow-for-blow, and you'll know why I don't need to say any more than that.DNA Match: David Flair vs. Buff Bagwell:
(Looks at the clock) I've got another 90 minutes left with this PPV? Oh my God, why did I pick this show? No one forced me to do it! David Flair will collect the DNA of Bagwell and prove tomorrow night that he's responsible for getting Stacy Keibler pregnant. I'm pretty sure it takes longer than 24 hours to get results for such a test. Schiavone speculates that the way for Flair to win is to make Bagwell bleed... does the same rules apply for Buff to win? This makes no sense. I just noticed the ring is covered with not one, but FOUR logos of Backstage Assault, available soon on the Nintendo 64. Buff controls to start, and bitch slaps Flair for being David Flair. Buff with a swinging neck breaker. Flair comes off the ropes with a sunset flip (in a match without pinfalls), but Buff blocks it anyway. Flair does his daddy's flip in the corner, heads to the top rope, and gets slammed off. Who didn't see that coming? Buff with clotheslines and mounted punches, allowing Flair to do a even more comical version of the face-flop. It's like a parody of the parody that Ric Flair became towards the last decade of his career. Flair with a low blow to FINALLY take control. The action spills outside, and Buff counters a piledriver with a back drop onto the EXPOSED concrete. Flair whips Bagwell into the rail, but a chair shot hits the ring post. Back in the ring, Bagwell with the chair, and he KO's Flair with it, and Flair blades to end this nonsense at 5:35. Bagwell still hits Flair with the Blockbuster, and for whatever reason, Lex Luger hits the ring, sporting a Yankees jersey. He takes Bagwell's head off with a clothesline, and Bagwell throws himself out of the ring. "How many times is Luger going to turn on people in WCW?" We're all asking the same question, Schiavone. Dumb match, but could've been worse... oh, Flair collects blood from Bagwell's mouth, so even by losing, he still wins? Stupid booking continues."The Cat" Ernest Miller (w/ Ms. Jones) vs. "Above Average" Mike Sanders (w/ Palumbo & Stasiak):
Sanders has a championship with him, and the fuck if I know which one of them it is. I guess this is not only a Kickboxing Match, but it's also for the SOLE position of the title of WCW's Commissioner. Is it me, or did WCW do matches over that false title every other week from 1999 through the end of WCW's life? Remember when Ernest Miller wrestled in the WWE? "Somebody call my momma!" Miller summons the spirit of Dave Chappelle, with the battle cry "Bitch, I'm gonna whip your ass!" We've got three two-minute rounds, apparantly. As if it will go that long. Round One: Miller knocks Sanders down with a kick to the face, but the referee doesn't understand that in REAL sports, the count is done in REAL time, not "stall 5 seconds between each second counted" like in wrestling. That ate up a third of the match. If someone was THIS hurt getting up, the match would be called, too. Just saying. Round TWO: Sanders probably has a loaded glove. Miller continues to dominate and takes a shot at Stasiak for being Shawn Stasiak. Miller with a leg-split uppercut, but Stasiak refuses to throw in the towel. Ugh... I wanted to make a Johnny Cage reference, there, too. FINAL ROUND: The referee hangs around, looking like the guy who played Pee-Wee in the Porky's movies, yelling at the entourage of baddies outside the ring. Douglas is at ringside, KO's the Cat with a chain wrapped around his fist, and not only did it take the referee 40-seconds to count to 9, but stopped counting, despite Miller NOT being on his feet. Miller heads outside and trades blows with Douglas, then gets counted-out of the ring at record speed to give Sanders the win... despite the three rounds being over and making no sense. This made Mr. T vs. Roddy Piper look like a masterpiece. Absolutely putrid anal waste.Mike Awesome vs. Vampiro:
Maybe this won't be so bad... last monday on Nitro, Vampiro chokeslams Crowbar through not one, but TWO tables. Oh, this is the "That 70's Guy" era of Mike Awesome. Wonderful. I guess it seems fitting to have a creepy bastard named Vampiro on a show called Halloween Havoc. Vampiro talks about Awesome having a title shot for the next night on Nitro... why hype a bigger, more important match, for the FREE show, during a PPV? Slugfest to start. They duck clotheslines until Awesome sends Vampiro out of the ring with a shoulder tackle. Awesome with a suicide dive, and the crowd barely pops for it. Sad. Awesome back drops Vampiro so hard into the crowd, he ends up 25-feet deep into the empty seats. They battle through the crowd, doing little of note. Where's the next gratuitous advertisement for Backstage Assault. Vampiro grabs a cane from someone and bashes Awesome with it. Then a FAN gets in on the action, gets bitched up by Awesome, and security pounces about three seconds later. Maybe it was an ECW fan out for revenge, but no real ECW fan would've gone to this shit storm of a show. Back in the ring, and we've got dueling chairs. Revenge of the Sith probably ripped off the final battle from this. Vampiro kicks the chair into Awesome, despite it being a good 6 inches away from any part of his body after contact. Vampiro nails Awesome with a sucky clothesline and more nothing happens. Vampiro stops Awesome's top rope attack and taks him down with a super belly-to-belly, losing his grip halfway through the spot. Vampiro comes off the top rope to sit on Awesome, but fucks it up, and Awesome pins Vampiro for a two count. Awesome pulls out a table, because we haven't seen enough of those, yet. Exactly WHAT title shot is this match for? All we hear is "title shot" but not "which title." Vampiro with the Michinoku Driver, then heads out of the ring for whatever stupid fucking reason. Vampiro gives up and runs in to get hit with a clothesline. Awesome takes Vampiro out of the ring and powerbomb's him on the arena floor for a two count. I didn't know this was a Falls Count Anywhere match... I love when WCW changes the rules on a whim. Back in the ring, and a Super Powerbomb finally ends this mess at 9:49. What a steaming pile of monkey feces. Cool finish, awful match the rest of the way.WCW "Canadian" Championship Match:
Lance Storm & "Hacksaw" Jim Duggan (w/ Major Gunns) vs. Hugh G. Rection:
The "Canadian" title is the United States Championship, with the Canadian flag sticker on top of it. Jim Duggan actually turned heel to become a member of Team Canada (for whatever reason), and Gunns is part of Team Canada under protest. At least I think that's Major Gunns. Turning Duggan heel to be Anti-american would've been better suited about a decade earlier when people would have cared. I liked Hugh Morrus, but not enough to consider him for a push for the second most important title in the promotion. Rection and Duggan go face-to-face to see who's uglier. Lockup and Duggan pounds away. Rection fights back and knocks Duggan out of the ring with a clothesline. Storm charges in and gets nailed with clotheslines, as well. Morrus no-sells chops and traps Storm in the corner for some punching. Storm with an inverted atomic drop, and Duggan tags in to "hammer" away. Storm tags in and gets sent out of the ring. Team Canada regains control, and it's just boring me to sleep. Storm with a jawbreaker and super-kick, but he spends too much time posing and only gets a two count when he finally does cover. Duggan looks like a drunken bum pulled off the streets. Duggan with a slam, and he signals for the big clothesline. Rection turns it into a double clothesline, and I hope Rection can make the hot tag to himself. Storm tags in and slaps on a sleeper hold. Madden's line "he's sucking the last bit of life out of General Rection" would've been a LOT dirtier had he gone with his full name instead of "general." Sorry, I'm trying to find some form of entertainment from this crap. Rection fights back, but gets KO'ed with a piledriver from the Duggan, but that only gets a two count. Suddenly, Elix Skipper hits the ring, and gets laid out by Major Gunns. Was that necessary? Storm goes outside to grab the 2x4, but she takes Storm out of the match, too, leading him up the aisle. Back in the ring, and Rection with a Russian leg sweep and the No Laughing Matter for the three count, United States Title, and Major Gunn's freedome at 10:10. Wow, winning the second best title by pinning a 78 year old Jim Duggan. Satisfying. To be fair, WWF was equally treating their secondary title like crap, giving Billy Gunn a run with it for no reason, sandwiched between reigns by Eddie Guerrero and Chris Benoit.
Sting vs. "The Chosen One" Jeff Jarrett:
I guess the storyline here is that Jarrett claims that Sting has lost his passion for the "sport", and he's going to prove that later tonight, making cryptic promises that makes me question what I'm doing to my mental health by watching this garbage. Sting's using Metallica's Seek and Destroy as his entrance music, which is pretty cool, I guess. Anything is lightyears better than "The Man Called Sting". Sting attacks Jarrett before the bell and whacks him with a chair. Up the aisle we go, and Sting drops Jarrett across the security rail. Into the ring, and Sting with the Stinger Splash. Sting sends Jarrett to the opposite corner, fakes the Splash, and connects with an atomic drop and a clothesline, sending Jarrett out of the ring.Suddenly, some doofus comes out, dressed like Sting... it's 1989 Halloween Havoc Sting, according to Schiavone. Real Sting heads out up the aisle and pounds away on 1989 Sting, then connects with the Scorpion Death Drop. Jarrett comes back to life and attacks, throwing Sting into the security rail. Sting quickly regains control as the action spills all over the arena. Suddenly Part 2, and it's Sgt. Pepper Sting, dressed like 1990 Halloween Havoc Sting, I guess. In the mean time, Sting 2000 takes Jarrett over with a suplex. Sgt. Pepper Sting makes chit-chat with himself, and gets his ass handed to him for it. They go into the ring, and 1990 Sting pounds away. Irish whip, and they blow THAT?! Sting tosses 1990 Sting over and out, goes up the aisle (didn't we see this already), Killer Bee ear smacks the shmuck, and tosses him into a part of the stage set. Sting with a hip toss and a Scorpion Death Drop, and thats the end of 1990 Sgt. Pepper Sting. Back in the ring, and guess what? Its Wolfpac Sting now, looking like a giant lobster. Who is that, Kidman? My head hurts watching this nonsense. Sting attacks, grabs the bat, and works Lobster Sting over with it, takes him up the aisle, and Scorpion Death Drop. Jarrett with the bat, and he goes Ozzie Canseco on Sting with it... hey, if Mark Madden is going to use DEREK JETER, I'm going to top the ridiculousness of that statement. Jarrett controls with generic brawling offense, then uses a chair on Sting. We finally return to the ring, and Jarrett is stomping away. Jarrett with a sleeper hold, Sting mounts a comeback, and... I don't need a lead in. Trenchcoat/Crow Sting shows up (looking exactly like 2000 Sting), but without the kickass intro with the kid blabbing on and on, tearing through the ring and dragging Sting down with him. That's not 1997 Sting, that's 1996 Undertaker! Real Sting comes back out with Bogus Sting #4, and he's bladed?!? Stinger Splash to Jarrett, and now the lights go out. What, was Sting a member of the Brood, too? Then, just because it wasn't ludicrous enough, ANOTHER sting, wearing a bad wig, repels from the roof. Sting just casually beats him up as Stevie Ray notes this Sting has to be 75 years old, and Madden says he's Sting from the year 2025. Scorpion Death Drop through the table, whatever. 1997 Sting returns, bashes Sting with a guitar, Sting no-sells it, Scorpion Death Drops him, Jarrett bashes Sting with ANOTHER guitar, and it's finally over at 14:39.
No, I did not make up that entire match. It actually happened, live, on Pay-Per-View, in front of thousands of innocent people. I honestly don't know how to describe how terribly booked and stupid this whole fiasco was, but if reading "Sgt. Pepper Sting runs in and gets beat up by Real Sting" and "Stevie Ray says this Sting has to be 75 Years Old" isn't enough to tell you just how mind numbingly stupid this last ten minutes was, then just turn off your screen, and never watch a wrestling show again, because this, right here, is what makes me embarrassed to be a wrestling fan. You have two talented wrestlers, and you put them out there with the whole purpose being "a bunch of guys dressed like Sting over the course of his career" run in, and then, for whatever reason, have a GERIATRIC STING run in, too. I don't get it, whoever came up with it probably didn't know what he was doing, and sadly this WAS NOT the poorest match booked on the show. Think about that one.
WCW World Heavyweight Championship Match:
Booker T © vs. Scott Steiner (w/ Midajah):
Michael Buffer does introductions, because I guess WCW just loved wasting money at this point. Booker T comes out first, despite being the babyface champion. Whatever. I guess he's just glad he's not G.I. Bro anymore. Remember THAT? Scott Steiner chokes out some guy because he's pissed his match isn't going on last. I love shoots that aren't supposed to be shoots. Lockup into the corner, Booker dodges a cheap-shot attempt. Booker with a hammerlock, but Steiner escapes with an elbow. They blow an Irish whip spot, and Booker connects with a diving forearm for a two count. Steiner stalls, threatening "fans" the whole time. Back in the ring, and Steiner pounds away on Booker. Booker T regains control and connects with a clothesline for a two count. Booker with mounted punches in the corner, and forgive me, I stopped caring after that last abomination. The "action" spills outside and a chair gets involved. WWF Main Event Brawl through the crowd time. We haven't seen THAT at all during this show. Oh, and then we get a table spot. Haven't had one of those in about six minutes. We were over due for it. Back in the ring, and Steiner with a clothesline and elbow for a two count. Steiner threatens referee Charles Robinson with Roid-Rage, then does a modified surfboard on the champion. Booker snaps off a neck breaker, but eats a clothesline going for the scissors kick. Steiner sets Booker up on the top turnbuckle and hits a Super-Samoan Drop, then does push ups to prove how hard he hasn't been working the entire match. I fast-forward a few minutes, and the Steiner-Recliner is applied. A new referee runs in and gets taken out for whatever reason. Here's a handful of other referees and "security" and he whips them all with a kendo stick, and it's a Disqualification at 13:29. Steiner grabs a chair and continues bashing Booker T into tenderized steak. Jeff Jarrett comes out for whatever fucking reason to "calm" Steiner down. Match would've been a great cure for Insomnia. You got to love PPV's with inconclusive finishes for the main event.
Goldberg vs. KroniK:
You know it's Vince Russo's baby if someone or something is named after a penis or a drug reference. KroniK is Brian Adams, formerly Crush in the WWF, and Bryan Clarke, formerly Adam Bomb in the WWF and Wrath in WCW. There's roughly ten minutes left on the broadcast. It's still too much time. By this point, Goldberg lost his cool factor, thanks to multiple lame jobs, turning him heel, and booking him to do stupid shit, causing serious injuries to himself. I wasn't paying attention, but I think Goldberg is pulling a "concussion syndrome" thing, risking permanent injury. Goldberg rushes the ring and no-sells their double team efforts. They dump Goldberg out of the ring, and he continues to no-sell their offense. Tony Schiavone says "this is no semblance of a match." No offense Tony, but this is more of a match than about half the shit on this PPV. Back in the ring, and KroniK with a double shoulder tackle. Adams pulls out a table, and Schiavone claims "we haven't seen one of those in a while, have we", thus earning 5-cool points from me for stating the obvious. Goldberg shrugs off a chokeslam attempt, kicks Adams out of the ring, and spears Clarke through the table for a three count at 2:26... but I guess he has to beat both men? Crush with the Cranium Crunch, then he turns it into a Full Nelson Slam. Irish whip is reversed, Goldberg with a Spear, and the Jackhammer finishes Adams off at 3:43. Well, I guess you HAD to put the match on, even if you have no time to give to it, and end the PPV literally 10-seconds after the fall.Final Thoughts: This might be the worst WCW Pay-Per-View of all time. Only the mentally unbalanced or someone under interrogation should be subjected to this filth. One good match, one of the most confusingly over-booked main events I have ever seen, nonsense like the mixed tag match, the retarded "kickboxing match", the DNA match that served no purpose, a main event with an inconclusive finish, poorly booking the outcome of the United States Championship, and tables, tables, and more tables. I think WCW Backstage Assault removed itself as the official sponsor of the show about an hour in, noticing the trend of awful the show was following.
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