AEW Dynamite: November 24, 2021
by Samoa Rowe
Happy late Thanksgivin Thumpin' to you and your's! Hope you all survived another year of COVID-19 and Black Friday stampedes. Now that you're all safe at home, no doubt enjoying this review on a sick new device, let's see what all the fuss about CM Punk vs. MJF is.
Live from the Wintrust Arena in Chicago, Illinois. Our hosts are Jim Ross, Tony Shiavone, and Excalibur.
CM Punk comes to the ring to a big ovation, and what do you know, 3 months of Happy CM Punk haven't soured his hometown fans' opinion of him. He's got a scheduled match, but he's immediately joined by MJF. They let the moment breathe first, before MJF fires the first shot with "Punky Brewster." MJF goes on to bury the pipebomb promo and suggests Punk looks like a meth head. He then accuses Punk of ducking him because he don't want none, and vows to verbally finish him quicker than his UFC career. Punk listens to everything MJF has to say and begins his retort with a casual "I am so disappointed in you." Punk had no idea that MJF's real name was Maxwell, he always thought it stood for "My Jealous Fan." Punk lives in MJF's head, who probably still has his poster on his bedroom wall. Punk silenced MJF without saying a word, gave him seven days to come up with zingers, and he showed up with low hanging fruit, like some kind of less famous Miz (crowd LOVES that one). MJF says nostalgia is a powerful drug, and that's all Punk is. Punk's promos are all robotic, he's gone soft, and based on his eyes, he's the only one who should go to sleep. Punk has gone so PG, he might as well be preaching "Hustle, Loyalty, Respect!" MJF goes on a long rant about how Punk has always been second best. Punk admits that he was a bit scared about returning to wrestling, but he's not scared right now, because he was selling out MSG while MJF was marking out over Rosie O'Donnell. Punk dares MJF to do another song and dance for him, this time he'll put him in the news as an obituary. Punk never mentioned MJF because he never had to. When he arrived in AEW, he chose Darby Allin, and MJF doesn't realize that he's been replaced in the Four Pillars by Britt Baker. Punk compares himself to Chicago, because when it burnt down, they rebuilt on the embers. Punk is happy to be number two, especially since MJF will only be number one if everyone waits around long enough for Tony Khan to have a daughter to marry. Punk is ready to punch MJF in his "needle d!ck" and looks to throw down, but MJF flees. I daresay this was a promo exchange for the ages.
CM Punk vs. QT Marshall (with The Factory)
This is an odd match to give the Chicago crowd, but I guess the previous talking segment should make up for any disappointment. The Factory's distraction fails to give QT an advantage, and Punk serves a series of scoop slams. QT escapes a chinlock, Nick Comoroto grabs Punk's leg, and the ref tosses The Factory. QT absorbs another scoop slam, and manages a knee lift to gain an opening for clubbing offense. Punk comes right back with turnbuckle punches and a hard Irish whip. Honestly, this should be over already, but QT thrusts Punk into the buckles to take control. Punk makes another quick comeback and hits a flying clothesline from the apron. It seems that we MUST take a commercial break. They return with Punk escaping a neck vice. QT hits a Liger Bomb for 2. QT finally gets some heat for his tantrum, and Punk makes a scrappy comeback. Punk hits the Hail to the King elbow drop and finishes with the GTS at 11:05. This felt every bit as long as it was. Total nothing match that dragged all the way to the finish, *.Winner: CM Punk
Tony Shiavone interviews Christian Cage and Jurassic Express backstage. The group feels good about the momentum they've built and the confidence that affords them. Jurassic Express are once again the #1 ranked tag team, and this time Christian will make sure they win the gold.
Eddie Kingston enjoys a meal at catering. He is amusingly interrupted by 2point0 and Daniel Garcia. They accuse Eddie of not being hungry anymore. Eddie becomes irate when they say he couldn't help Moxley, and they throw his coffee into his eyes, and chaos follows.
The Gunn Club (Colten and Billy, with Austin) vs. Bear Country (Bronson and Boulder)
The Gunn Club blindside Bear Country before the bell, but get quickly clear from the ring. Billy uses his veteran instincts to dodge charging attacks at ringside, causing the Bears to wipe out against the rails and ring steps. Bronson recovers for an overhead suplex on Colten. Austin trips Bronson, allowing Colten to finish with the Colt 45 at 1:57. I am so relieved this didn't last 11 minutes and have a commercial break, *.Winners: The Gunn Club
The Gunn Club's celebration is interrupted by Sting on the stage. Austin charges at Sting, but Darby Allin intercepts with a decapitation clothesline. Darby and Sting chase Billy and Colten from the ring, and I guess this is an ongoing feud that must continue.
AEW's first Saturday special, Battle for the Belts, is announced for January 8th.
Adam Cole and Bobby Fish vent together about their recent setbacks. They're joined by Best Friends, who rub it in their faces that they are better friends than Fish and Cole. They are sick of being disrespected, so the logical match will happen later.
Tony Shiavone hangs out while Team Taz offer Dante Martin a contract. Taz doesn't know why Lio Rush has a copy or why he's even in the room. Rush says they want no part of their business, but then looks on incredulously as Dante signs the contract. Dante steps over the table, leaving Rush speechless.
TBS Championship Tournament - Quarterfinals:
Jamie Hayter (with AEW Women's Champion Britt Baker and Rebel) vs. Thunder Rosa
They aggressively lock up and throw each other around. Rosa throws a fierce slap to the face, Hayter throws her out but takes a reverse whip into the barricade. Hayter recovers, but Rosa hangs her in the ropes for a dropkick to the spine. Rosa smashes Hayter against the rails and follows with a baseball slide dropkick and vertical suplex onto the floor. Hayter reverses a crossbody with a slam into the ring post. Back from commercials, Rosa desperately hits a missile dropkick to get back into the fight. Rosa' shotgun dropkick gets 2. Hayter answers with a uranage backbreaker. The fans will Rosa to escape a chinlock, Hayter blocks a leg sweep, and they slug it out. Rosa floats over for a leg sweep and applies a neck tie. Rebel distracts the ref while Britt pulls Rosa away from Hayter. Britt misses a superkick and blasts Hayter. Rosa throws Britt into Rebel, and rolls up Hayter to win at 10:41. They were having a heckuva brawl before the match devolved into shenanigans, ***½.Winner: Thunder Rosa
Alex Marvez interviews Chris Jericho backstage. Jericho is feeling festive about Thanksgiving, but gets rudely interrupted by 2point0 and Daniel Garcia. Jericho calls them jackasses for what they did to Eddie Kingston, but gets distracted by Matt Lee's square head. Jericho warns them to never interrupt him again and the trio backs away. Jericho wishes Marvez a happy Thanksgiving, but still cannot get over the shape of Lee's head, it looks like a rubix cube.
Britt Baker hosts Friendsgiving with Tony Shiavone and Rebel. Britt is grateful that she can host the best time for her friends, although Rebel would be better off not eating a roll (which she swats away). Tony is grateful to be here, but has to show footage from All Out, revealing that Riho was never eliminated from the Casino Battle Royal. This means that Riho will face Britt on Rampage in a Black Friday Deal match. Britt yells at Tony for ruining Thanksgiving and revokes his invitation to the Christmas party.
Colt Cabana (with The Dark Order) vs. Bryan Danielson
Colt enjoys a hometown ovation and looks happy just to be here. That's good, because Bryan aggressively goes after him at the bell, and hits an armlock suplex. The crowd boos Bryan for taking a cheap shot after a clean break. Colt uses his technical wrestling chops to reverse a surfboard hold and hoist Bryan up onto his boots. Bryan slips free and unleashes chops, but Colt fires back. The fans chant for Cabana and Bryan misses his corner dropkick. Cabana misses the Flying Apple and Bryan capitalizes with a vicious German suplex. Bryan hits the running dropkick and dissects Colt's chest with chops and kicks. Colt blocks an avalanche back suplex and lands a moonsault for a great nearfall! Bryan traps Colt's arms and stomps his face! Bryan flexes before fully applying the LaBell Lock for the submission at 5:11! Strong short match here, Colt got enough that it wasn't really an extended squash, but Bryan looked to be in control throughout. Also, a close up reveals that Colt lost a tooth, **½.Winner: Bryan Danielson
Tony Shiavone gets a word in with Bryan Danielson after his victory. Bryan thinks it's funny that the fans booing him today gave him a much different reaction at All Out, and brings back his "fickle" catchphrase. Next week, he invites any of the Dark Order guys from Atlanta to get their heads kicked in. He's joined by AEW World Champion Hangman Adam Page, and the crowd welcomes him with a "Cowboy Sh!t" chant. Page says Bryan has made his point and rather than hurt any more Dark Order guys, they should have their title match right now. Bryan scoffs because he's already wrestled and that isn't "cowboy sh!t, it's coward sh!t." Page still wants to fight and offers to give Bryan the first shot. Bryan feels insulted and slaps Hangman, prompting a brawl. Bryan runs away from a Buckshot lariat, leaving Hangman to stand tall.
Video promo hyping up Ruby Soho vs. Kris Statlander in the TBS Championship tournament. They have a friendly rivalry but neither are going to budge when they face off on Rampage.
Malakai Black, Andrade El Idolo (with Jose), and AAA Tag Team Champions FTR (with Tully Blanchard) vs. Cody Rhodes (with Arn Anderson), Pac, and AEW Tag Team Champions Lucha Bros. (with Alex Abrahantes)
Cody starts against Dax in a shoving contest. Dax hits a shoulder block, counters with his uppercut and power slam. Cody tosses his belt into the crowd, but it gets thrown back (and hits Aubrey Edwards, not cool, guys). Pac and Dax trade chops, Pac builds steam with running forearms. Dax answers with a back suplex, but Pac is ready to arm drag a fresh Wheeler. Cash reverses a wristlock, shows off with a cartwheel, but then walks into Pac's big boot. Pac holds Cash in place for Penta's flying stomp to the groin. Thrust kick by Penta, but Cash answers with a lariat. Andrade rushes in for a nearfall. Fenix tags and flusters Andrade with an enziguri, rana, and dropkick. Death Triangle hit Andrade with triple kicks and dropkicks. Cody tags himself in (to boos) and immediately gets caught in FTR's corner (to cheers). Cody flees and tags in Fenix, who hits a double cutter! Fenix cleans house in spectacular fashion until Tully's distraction allows Malaki to hit a back heel trip. Fenix gets cut off from making a tag just in time for some commercials. They return just in time for Penta's hot tag and house cleaning sequence. Pac gets his shots in as well, hitting Black with a mean German suplex and plancha onto FTR and Andrade. Pac dissects Andrade with his feet, but gets caught by Wheeler's backbreaker. Penta hits Made in Japan on Cash, but gets caught by Dax's piledriver. Fenix ambushes Dax with a flying arm drag. Cody sneaks in for Cross Rhodes on Black. Cody misses a superkick and hits Pac! Andrade drops the hammer on Cody but runs into a bell to belly into the corner from Pac! Everyone takes a breather to an ovation. Arn and Tully enter the ring and tease a scuffle, but they decide to beat up Jose instead. Fenix saves Arn with a dive onto FTR, Penta dishes out Sling Blades, and Lucha Bros. clear the ring for dives. Black spits mist into Pac's face, allowing Andrade to finish with a spike DDT at 16:15! Sneaky great match that felt like a party and advanced numerous feuds, ****.Winners: Andrade El Idolo, Malakai Black, and FTR
Final Thoughts: This Dynamite continued to reset the table post Full Gear. I really enjoy where things are going with Hangman vs. Bryan, Punk vs. MJF, the TBS tournament, and the mix of Cody, Pac, Malakai, and Andrade. I'm not sure the world needs a Gunn Club push, but that's a minor point. Good show, check this out if you missed it.
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