WWE Survivor Series 2004
by Samoa Rowe
November 14, 2004
-From Cleveland, Ohio. Our hosts are Jerry Lawler, Jim Ross, Michael Cole, and Tazz.
This takes place during Spike’s weird, but entertaining run as “The Boss” with an awesome beard and a bad attitude. Match starts with Chavo looking for revenge against Kidman and Spike stomping the chest of Rey. Spike and Kidman form a brief alliance before Kidman’s betrayal, and Mysterio clears them from the ring. Rey and Chavo are alone for a face vs. face sequence before Spike returns. Meanwhile, Rey nails a hurricanrana on Kidman off the apron. Chavo then counters Rey with a toss to the floor which Rey turns into a seated senton on Kidman. Guerrero connects with a dive, but Spike misses his attempt. Chavo dominates Kidman, but Spike and Mysterio prevent any pinfalls. Chavo suffers an electric chair while superplexing Kidman, thanks to Spike. Rey counters the Dudley Dog and nails 619. Kidman prevents a West Coast Pop! Chavo nails the Gory Bomb on Spike, but Kidman breaks the cover with a springboard leg drop. Rey takes out Kidman, sadly leaving Spike free to pin Chavo at 9:01. This match just flew by, some unlikely participants got to shine on pay-per-view, **½.
Spike Dudley © vs. Rey Mysterio vs. Billy Kidman vs. Chavo Guerrero
Winner and still Cruiserweight Champion: Spike Dudley
-Paul Heyman hypes up Heidenreich backstage. Snitsky confronts Heidenreich and they awkwardly grunt in each other’s faces. Snitsky likes Heidenreich’s poetry, and John likes what Gene does to babies. They tease an alliance to foreshadow a tag match with Kane and Undertaker that ended up never happening.
They lock up and Benjamin goes right after the arm. Christian hides in the ropes to escape a waist lock. Shelton outwrestles Christian and bounces into a shoulder block. Christian slaps the face, prompting a fiery response from Benjamin. Springboard neck breaker by Benjamin gets a 2 count. Christian throws some hard shots but Shelton lands on his feet in a monkey flip. Tomko grabs Benjamin’s boot, allowing Christian to knock the champion off the apron. Christian deliberately wears Shelton down for a bit. Christian calls Benjamin a “flash in the pan” which inspires a desperate hard Irish whip from the champion. With 10 minutes gone, Benjamin forges a comeback. Benjamin counters with a suplex bouncing off the top rope. Shelton misses the Stinger Splash and Christian nails a DDT for a scary near fall. Tomko slides the IC title to Christian, but Benjamin counters by kicking it into the face. Springboard DDT by Benjamin only gets 2! Tomko sneaks in for a big boot on Benjamin, but Christian only gets 2 on the cover! Shelton kicks Tomko off the apron and counters the Unprettier with a T-Bone suplex for the win at 13:20! The match told a nice story about Benjamin raising his game, but was a bit slow for too long to be anything special, **¾.
Shelton Benjamin © vs. Christian (with Tomko)
Winner and still Intercontinental Champion: Shelton Benjamin
-Kurt Angle bumps into Edge at catering. Angle is upset that Edge wrote about the time Angle was naked and bleeding in a hotel room. Edge doesn’t apologize because it was funny. Angle mockingly says he loved the chapter where Edge won the World title (as that had not happened yet). Edge reminds Angle that he took out Shawn Michaels, something Angle could never do. Angle storms off but bumps into Eugene, who is overexcited to see him. Eugene matter-of-factly tells Angle that he sucks, based on the famous crowd chant. Eugene segments never end well.
Classic Survivor Series Match:
Carlito looks like he’s seen a ghost when Cena storms out. Carlito had recently had Cena stabbed at a nightclub. Cena attacks Carlito and Jesus and chases them backstage. Carlito and Jesus steal a car from some random woman and speed away, despite Cena smashing his arm against the window. Meanwhile, a brawl breaks out in the arena and the match finally starts when Big Show tosses Jindrak into the ring. Jindrak is a glutton for punishment until Kurt Angle interferes to ambush Guerrero. Team Angle manages to isolate Guerrero with some quick tags. Eddie eventually counters Jindrak with a hurricanrana and makes the hot tag to RVD. Jindrak tries to save Angle but eats a Five Star Frog Splash! Angle gets a botched roll-up to eliminate RVD at 8:44. Eddie rolls up Jindrak with his feet on the ropes to get rid of him at 9:13. The match restarts with Big Show squaring off with Luther Reigns and it’s just what you’d expect. Big Show shakes off Angle’s interference and choke slams Luther for the pin at 10:25. Angle counters a choke slam with the Ankle Lock! Show breaks the hold, so Angle decides to take a hike. RVD blocks Angle on the stage, backing him into Big Show. Angle suffers Cena’s F-U and Guerrero’s Frog Splash and gets pinned by Show at 12:21. Completely underwhelming contest here, with a drawn out heat segment followed by rapid eliminations, **.
Kurt Angle, Mark Jindrak, Luther Reigns, and U.S. Champion Carlito (with Jesus) vs. Big Show, Rob Van Dam, Eddie Guerrero, and John Cena
Survivors: Big Show, John Cena, and Eddie Guerrero
-Gene Snitsky assaults Maven during an interview and busts him open. It doesn’t look like Maven will be able to compete later.
Heidenreich (with Paul Heyman) vs. The Undertaker
I bet Heyman is really missing Brock Lesnar right about now, I know I am. Undertaker blocks a punch and takes control of the early going. Heyman distracts the ref, allowing Heidenreich to counter Old School with a low blow. Heidenreich crotches Taker in the ring post, thanks to another Heyman distraction. Heidenreich takes control of the match with your typical standing brawl offense. Undertaker turns it around , delivering a guillotine drop-kick on the apron. Taker goes Old School and nails a DDT for 2. Taker misses a head of steam and hangs his leg up on the turnbuckle. Heidenreich knocks Taker off the apron and retakes control. Taker absorbs some badly executed punishment and hangs Heidenreich on the ropes. Flying clothesline by Taker gets a 2 count. Undertaker’s comeback continues with Snake Eyes and a big boot. Heidenreich counters with a sidewalk slam for a near fall. Undertaker counters again with the Last Ride, but Heidenreich gets the ropes. Undertaker’s back suplex leaves them both down for a breather. Taker finishes it with the choke slam and Tombstone Piledriver at 15:51. The match was pretty boring, but somehow Taker has had worse matches with better opponents, this one didn’t actively suck like I thought it would, *¾.
Winner: The Undertaker
-Maria interviews Eric Bischoff backstage about the Maven situation. Bischoff refuses to name a replacement for Randy Orton’s team, because he’s about to take a vacation and doesn’t want to ruin it by creating controversy.
Lita charges in and clocks Trish in the head. It’s a straight up brawl as Trish retreats to the floor. Lita knocks Trish into a chair and then connects with some chair shots to earn a DQ at 1:18. The crowd boos that decision. This wasn’t really a match, so no rating.
Trish Stratus © vs. Lita
Winner via DQ: Trish Stratus
-Trish has a bad nose bleed as Lita refuses to let up the attack. Referees break them up. Trish panics over the blood but then gets angry once she realizes she’s okay.
-Teddy Long congratulates the Smackdown survivors on their match, but asks for some alone time with John Cena. Big Show is only wearing a towel and hands it to Cena off-screen, which seems to gross Cena out. Long announces that Carlito will have to defend the U.S. title against Cena on Smackdown. Remember when WWE cared about Smackdown ratings?
This was about the time I was finally accepting that Bradshaw was WWE Champion, a mere five months after he won the damn title. We get a slow start as they exchange punches. JBL delivers a neck breaker and kidney shot for a 2 count. Back body drop by Booker T and a clothesline to the floor. JBL thumbs the eyes and tosses Booker over the announce table. Booker trips JBL on the table, but Orlando Jordan ambushes Booker from behind (no gay joke intended). JBL takes control with offense that would bore Heidenreich. Booker counters with a superplex! Booker continues to roll with a Bookend on the floor, and a super-kick to Jordan. Back to the ring, Booker nails a missile drop-kick, but JBL gets the ropes. Jordan distracts long enough for Booker to miss the Harlem Hangover. Booker counters a sleeper with a back suplex. Booker builds some steam, complete with a bicycle kick. Jordan interferes AGAIN with a trip, allowing a JBL DDT for a near fall. Booker inadvertently knocks JBL into the referee for a bump, leading to Jordan blatantly interfering. Josh Mathews, of all people, makes the save, but JBL knocks him down. Booker bounces back with the Scissors Kick, but there’s no referee! A second ref runs in, but Jordan prevents a cover. Booker nails Jordan with the Bookend, but JBL clocks him with the WWE title for the win at 14:40. They were actually keeping a good pace before the overbooked nonsense kicked in at the end for the routinely frustrating finish, **¼.
John Bradshaw Layfield © (with Orlando Jordan) vs. Booker T
Winner and still WWE Champion: JBL
-Triple H, Batista, and Ric Flair are all smiles about tonight’s main event, which will give them control of Raw for the next 2 weeks if they win.
Classic Survivor Series Match:
The members of the winning team will each get a turn as Raw GM over the next four weeks. They start with quick tags. Edge and Benoit rekindle their feud, while Orton goes after his former Evolution teammates. Benoit goes wild throwing German suplexes and slams Edge onto Triple H. Benoit connects with a diving head butt on both HHH and Edge! Benoit catches HHH in the Sharpshooter, but Snitsky makes the save. Batista saves Edge from the crossface. Triple H nails the Pedigree on Benoit for the Edge pinfall at 7:23. Snitsky and Triple H argue over a tag, allowing Jericho to nearly finish HHH with the Walls. Flair prevents a Lionsault and gets tossed out for his trouble. Batista nails a double clothesline and continues to roll with a spinebuster on Jericho. Orton clocks Batista with the World title, allowing Jericho to hit the enziguri for an elimination at 10:38. Jericho drop-kicks Edge into Snitsky at ringside, but suffers a revenge attack from Batista. Jericho gets isolated and takes a beating. Maven joins the match for the hot tag and looks for revenge on Snitsky. Maven clears the ring and hits a bulldog on Triple H! Snitsky delivers a chair shot to Maven to get himself disqualified at 16:00. Snitsky gets his money’s worth with another chair shot to Orton on his way out. Triple H pins Maven at 16:45, capitalizing on the damage from the chair. Jericho is running on fumes but blocks a Pedigree. Edge spears Jericho for the elimination at 18:05. Orton is now alone against Triple H and Edge in a handicap match scenario. Orton drop-kicks Edge into Triple H and rolls him up for a near fall. HHH storms in for an illegal spinebuster. Edge misses a spear and wipes out HHH! The RKO finishes Edge at 22:55! HHH blocks the RKO and nails a blind low blow! Orton counters the Pedigree with the RKO to end it at 24:27! The entire match served the purpose of getting Orton over as a world-conquering baby face, but he ruins it with that stupid fuckin' pose. This was a generally solid main event, elevated by the unique stipulation and some fresh faces (this was the first PPV main event for Batista, Edge, Snitsky, and Maven). Overall, a *** outing.
World Heavyweight Champion Triple H, Batista (with Ric Flair), Edge, and Gene Snitsky vs. Randy Orton, Chris Benoit, Chris Jericho, and Maven
Survivor: Randy Orton
Final Thoughts: As you can tell by the star ratings, this was a completely skippable, middle of the road, event. I think these sort of ** extravaganzas are the most frustrating to review, as there’s not really anything horrible to mock, nor anything to get excited over. Thumbs down for wasting my time.
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