WWF Survivor Series 2001
by Scrooge McSuck
- My reaction to hearing it announced on Monday Night Raw that the Invasion would end at the Survivor Series: Thank you, God! What started off as something exciting as fresh gradually spiraled down the drain like the turd it turned out to be. WWF vs. WCW turned into WWF vs. The Alliance, consisting mostly of WWF workers, some of who have never even worked for WCW (I'm looking at you Test and Kurt Angle!), and our fresh new matches became the same old crap we've seen countless times already. How anyone can possibly screw this up is just impossible. So impossible, it's very probable that the storyline was intended to fail, just to prove how superior the WWF really was to WCW, that WCW couldn't compete with the WWF, and WCW alone wasn't enough to generate an audience, so the WWF had to turn WCW into WWF Jr. (a.k.a Alliance) to justify it being around. With that out of the way, my thoughts and opinions on the rest of the show will be purely based on the quality of what is presented.
- Originally broadcasted on Pay-Per-View, live from the Greensboro Coliseum in Greensboro, NC, on November 18th, 2001. Jim Ross (of the WWF) and Paul Heyman (of the "Alliance") are calling all the action tonight. Guess what theme song is used to hammer home "this is the end" of the Invasion angle? Atlantis, by Donovan, of course! Oh, and the second theme song is "Control" by Puddle of Mudd.
- Just a quick note: You're porobably wondering "if Team X wins, what about champions from the "other" side?" Well, the loop-hole for that is that any Alliance/WWF member that ends the night a Champion, will remain employed, even if his team loses the Winner Takes All Match, so Christian will still be around, just incase the Alliance loses.
- I'm going to ignore a lot of the backstage stuff concerning all the pep-talks for the "Winner Takes All" Match, because it's the same shit over and over again. People are nervous, tension is high, you know, the usual for a pre-determined form of entertainment. Oh, and Vince McMahon drops the S-bomb. Yay.
The Hardys play dead, but the Dudleys neither go for pins or escapes. They connect with a double team neckbreaker on Jeff, but only gets a two count. I guess now the standard tag rules do NOT apply. Bubba crushes Matt against the fence, and I'm surprised it didn't slice Matt into 98 inidividual slices with the momentum before the impact. Jeff takes a beating in the corner. The Dudleys climb opposite corners, D'Von misses a headbutt, and Bubba misses a back splash. Matt climbs the top rope and comes off with a double clothesline. Matt throws Bubba into the cage and hits D'Von with a neck breaker. Matt with a DDT on Bubba Ray for a two count. Jeff comes back to life and leg drops D'Von between the legs. Irish whip, and a double back drop on Bubba Ray. The Hardys climb the turnbuckles and hit the splash and leg drop combination, but D'Von breaks the pin attempt. Matt tries to climb out, but D'Von Tree of Woes him in the top of the cage. Bubba with a slam on Jeff, and it's Wassup time. Remember when THAT was cool? Bubba calls to STACY to get the tables, and she shows Nick Patrick some ass for access to the keys. Wow, she's actually useful for once. Matt spears Bubba before the 3-D can be executed, and Jeff counters D'Von's half of the move with a DDT. Matt climbs up again, and this time actually manages to escape. Um... that leaves Jeff alone with a table in the ring, in a match where pinfalls count. You moron! Jeff rams D'Von into the cage, and it don't taste like chocolate! Jeff tries climbing out, but he sees D'Von on the table, and because HE'S an even bigger retard, attempts the senton bomb, and guess what... SPLAT! Hey Matt, climb back in, FAST. Bubba wakes up, rolls around a bit, and covers Jeff to unify the tag titles at 15:46. Meh... another okay match, that definitely picked up momentum about halfway through, but underwhelming for the fact it's supposed to be this big unification match, and there was nothing special about it. I'm also not a fan of these tag team cage matches without solid rules. First, they have to tag in and out, but then it's Texas Tornado rules? Make up your fucking minds.
- The WWF plays one of those well-done music videos they were known for, set to the tune of My Sacrifice by Creed (although it's edited out on the VHS and DVD release with generic ass music playing). I swear to all that is holy, if the WWF was put in a corner where an entire show had to be music video/montages, I think they could've done a damn good job with it. It's all about song selection, of course, but put with wrestling footage, even My Sacrifice sounds good.
Rock and Austin start with a slugfest. Irish whip and Austin with the Thesz Press and a series of rights, followed by the F-U elbow drop for a quick two count. Irish whip, and this time the Rock is the one with the Thesz Press and a big old FU for the Alliance, before dropping an elbow for a two count, broken up by Shane. Booker tags in to put the boots to the Rock. The Rock comes off the ropes with a clothesline, but Shane breaks another pin attempt. Jericho tags in and takes Booker down with a flap jack, followed by a basement dropkick. RVD tags in, and Jericho slaps on a headlock. Criss-cross sequence, and Jericho hits a spinning heel kick, followed by a suplex. Jericho wins a slugfest and chops away. Irish whip, Jericho misses a dropkick, and RVD hits a hand-spring splash for a two count. Whip to the corner is reversed, and Jericho traps him in the Walls of Jericho, but Shane breaks that up, too. Kane and Angle tag in. Kane tosses Angle into the corner and unloads with rights, followed by a clothesline. Angle counters a suplex and takes Kane down with a release German. Whip to the corner is reversed, and Kane takes Angle down with a sidewalk slam. Kane to the top rope, and he hits his signature clothesline, but guess who breaks up the pin? Undertaker tags in next, and pounds on Angle with rights. Undertaker charges into the corner and eats an elbow. Booker tags back in and gets to taste the boot of the Undertaker. Leg drop from Deadman Inc, but Shane breaks that pin attempt, too. Undertaker goes to work on the arm, and it's time to go Old School. Undertaker continues working the arm, confusing the WWF with UFC, already. Undertaker with a clothesline for a two count. You know the drill, by now. Austin tags in and stomps a mudhole in the corner. Austin misses a splash across the back and eats a clothesline. Undertaker goes Old School again, and Shane breaks it up again. Undertaker ends up being Quadruple teamed in the corner, since that's the only way the great Undertaker can lose. Angle with a swinging neck breaker for a two count. Undertaker battles back, and plants Angle with a desperation DDT. Big Show gets the job tag and plows through Angle with clotheslines. Show takes shots at everyone, until getting taken down with the Angle Slam. Booker T tags in, and connects with the head scissors, and it's Spin-a-Rooni time! RVD tags in, and now it's the Five-Star Frog Splash. Shane gets the tag in now, and comes off the top with an elbow drop, and he covers for three at 12:41, eliminating the Big Show.
Shane celebrates, but the Rock doesn't find it amusing and beats the ever loving piss out of the young McMahon. Rock runs through Shane with a clothesline, Kane tags in, and makes Shane part of the canvas with a chokeslam. The Undertaker tags in, and I think we all know what's going to happen... fuck the "Last Ride", we're going old school, and he KILLS Shane with the Tombstone Piledriver. Jericho tags in, and bounces off the ropes with a Lionsault, and Shane is D-O-N-E at 14:31, evening the sides at 4-4.
Angle comes in to slug it out with Jericho. Jericho escapes a belly-to-belly and comes off the ropes with a diving forearm, followed by a double-underhook backbreaker for a two count. Angle with a takedown and mounted punches. Booker T tags in as Shane is carried backstage by Tony Garea and Some Other Guy. Booker with a pair of slams, no doubt inspiring Mike Knox for later matches. RVD tags back in and lays into Jericho with kicks. Whip to the corner, and RVD with a pair of shoulders to the midsection. Jericho surprises RVD with a sunset flip, then takes him down with a clothesline. Kane tags in to pound away, then boots RVD coming off the ropes. Kane with a pair of clotheslines. RVD tries his monkey flip spot in the corner, but tastes another clothesline. Kane with a powerslam, but then gets distracted by Booker T. RVD takes Kane down with a spinning heel kick, and comes off the top with the Five-Star Frog Splash, but Kane sits up, choking RVD down. Booker runs in with a scissors kick, and it's a brawl! RVD goes to the top again and hits a missile dropkick for a three count at 18:19 sends Kane back to the locker room. A frog splash doesn't hurt, but a kick to the MASK is enough to pin him? Lame.
Undertaker comes back in to beat RVD into Jelly, then works over Booker, Angle, and Austin, as well, charging into all the corners with clotheslines. And people bitched about Hulk Hogan. Undertaker clears RVD and Booker from the ring, then rolls the dice with Angle (or snake eyes, whatever). Undertaker calls for the Last Ride on Angle, but Booker comes in with a chair, but it's not successful. Austin hits the Stunner though, cause the WCW is pathetic, then drags Angle on top of the Undertaker, eliminating the Dead Man at 20:03, leaving the Rock and Jericho alone, two men who haven't been getting along.
Booker T tosses the Rock back in the ring and hammers away. Irish whip is reversed, and Booker with a side heel kick. The Rock is playing possum, and surprises Booker with a DDT for a two count. Jericho is still incapacitated from the brawl earlier, just to hammer home how much trouble Team WWF is in. Booker with knees to the midsection, but he runs right into a Samoan drop. Rock whips Booker into Angle, just standing around on the apron, and Rocky rolls Booker up for a surprise three count at 22:34. That just seemed to come out of nowhere.
RVD comes in and kicks away at Rock, then throws some sucky punches, too. Stick to the kicking, Rob. You're better at that than punching. Whip to the corner is reversed, but Rocky eats boot. RVD tries to do something, but Rock rolls RVD up from the top rope for a two count. Jericho gets the hot tag and dropkicks RVD on the back of his head. Jericho comes off the ropes with a forearm and shoulder block, followed by a swinging neckbreaker for a two count. Jericho with a running bulldog, but the Lionsault misses, and RVD connects with a spinning heel kick. RVD with the split-legged moonsault, but Jericho got the knees up, and hits the reverse Russian Leg sweep, and pins RVD at 24:57, leaving the battle of WWF vs. the Alliance down to... the Rock & Jericho vs. Austin & Angle. (flushes toilet)
Angle works over Jericho in the corner, while outside the ring, Austin slingshots the Rock into the ring post, no doubt resulting in a blade job, unless I'm thinking about Shawn Michaels. Back in the ring, and Angle has Jericho trapped in a chinlock. Jericho escapes with elbows, but Angle with a single leg trip and stomping for a two count. Austin tags back in and does his usual stuff. Austin sets Jericho up on the top turnbuckle and takes him down with a super-plex for a two count. We get a blown spot, so Jericho covers it up grabbing a front facelock. Austin back drops free, drops an elbow, and covers for a two count. Angle tags back in, and chokes Jericho across the middle rope. Irish whip, and Angle with a back elbow for a two count. Jericho counters a German suplex with a victory roll, but then quickly turns it into the Ankle Lock. Angle escapes, and takes Jericho off his feet with a clothesline. Austin tags in, and takees Jericho down with a slam and suplex. Austin catches Jericho coming off the ropes with an elbow, then chokes away. Angle and Austin take turns putting the boots to Jericho, and we've hit a dull spot. Jericho escapes a chinlock and slugs it out with Austin until we get a double clothesline spot. The Rock gets the hot tag and takes Angle over with a belly-to-belly suplex. Rock with the dragon whip, and he slaps the Sharpshooter on, forcing Angle to tap out at 31:55, leaving Stone Cold by himself to defend the honor of WCW, the same company that fired him via FedEx.
Jericho tags himself into the match and chops away on Austin in the corner. Jericho with a cross body, but Austin rolls through for a two count. Jericho blocks the Thesz Press and goes for the Walls of Jericho, but Austin rakes the eyes, sweeps the legs, and goes for the hold himself, but Jericho fights it off. Jericho nails Austin coming off the ropes, but meets the knees going for the Lionsault. Austin covers, getting a two count. Austin sets Jericho up on the top turnbuckle and lays into him with more chops. Jericho fights Austin off, and connects with a missile dropkick for a two count. Irish whip is reversed, and Jericho cradles Austin for a two count. Austin with an UGLY counter, and that gets three at 34:32, meaning we're down to Rock-Austin, the ReMatch! Jericho, Sportsman of the Year, interrupts the action and lays Rocky out with his facebuster finishing move that kind of disappeared after a few months.
Austin comes to, and crawls over to make the cover, but Rock kicks out at two. Jericho starts going back to the ring, for whatever reason, but the Undertaker runs back to ringside to punk Jericho out like his name was Shawn Michaels at WrestleMania XIV. I completely forgot about that happening. Austin mounts the Rock and hammers away with more rights, followed by mudhole stomping. Rock gets back to his feet and retaliates with rights of his own, but gets tossed over the top rope for his troubles. They trade blows again until the Rock is introduced to the post again. The Rock throws Austin into the Spanish announcers table and opens his own can of whoop ass. Back in the ring, and Heyman questions why J.R. keeps asking him to kiss his ass. Good question, Paul. Irish whip, and Austin with a spinebuster, followed by the Sharpshooter! Ring the fucking bell! Sorry, got caught up in the wrong Survivor Series, especially since Heyman references Hebner's past. Austin really does the suckiest Sharpshooter ever. Rock grabs the ropes to force a break, though. Austin heads outside and grabs his WWF championship, but whiffs on a swing. Rock with the spinebuster and sharpshooter this time, and his sharpshooter might be worse than Austin's. Nothing is worse than Shawn Michaels' on Hulk Hogan at SummerSlam 2005, though. Austin goes low behind the back of the referee, but Rocky blocks the kick and hits Austin with the Stunner, instead. Nick Patrick inteferes with the count and KO's Hebner. Rock goes the Rock Bottom on Patrick, but Austin saves and gives the Rock the Stone Cold Bottom for a fast two count (about as fast as Starrcade '97's gast count). Austin lays out Patrick for not counting three, and drags Hebner back in the ring. We get ANOTHER referee bump, though, and Stone Cold hits the Stunner. Kurt Angle returns to ringside, grabs the title belt, and lays Austin out with it. Rock with the Rock Bottom, and the three count is made at 44:49, and all is right in the world of the World Wrestling Federation. We cut back and forth to the "Alliance" and WWF Locker Rooms, and hey, it's Steve Lombardi, and Stephanie McMahon overacting so badly it makes me long for a William Shatner movie. If you ignore the absurd layout of the storyline, a rather satisfying Elimination Match, and a quality main event, too. This might've been the longest Survivor Series Match, too.
To rant on the end of the storyline: With the WWF winning, and only a handful of "heels" left from the Alliance, the next few weeks, it seemed like we got rapid-fire heel turns to balance the roster out. Jericho finally fully turned, the Undertaker chopped off his hair and forced Jim Ross to kiss Vince McMahon's ass, and Kurt Angle's face-turn lasted all of a day, as Vince McMahon suddenly became evil Mr. McMahon again, and yes, the next night on raw, Stone Cold magically was a babyface again as a result of it, Rob Van Dam was turned face because no one would boo him, and we also got the return of RIC FLAIR. Yes, a credible WCW name was NOT brought in until AFTER the Invasion angle ended. Yes. Not only Flair, but other names as well came in in the months after. Hulk Hogan, Kevin Nash, Scott Hall, Curt Hennig, Dustin Rhodes, and a host of others could've been brought in and used to give credibility to the Alliance, but for whatever reason (we already mentioned it), this didn't happen, and WCW's "stars" were either depushed like DDP, or fired after just a couple of appearances, like Buff Bagwell and KroniK. The whole storyline was a mess, the fresh quality of programming lasted only a couple of weeks, and the final battle came down to mainstays of the WWF.
Final Thoughts: Solid show, for the most part. The main event is worth a look, the undercard features a handful of decent matches, with nothing being outright terrible. There's some pointless stuff, like the Battle Royal and Women's Match, but they were short and inoffensive. If you can ignore the whole Invasion thing, then it's a satisfying show. If you let your mind become consumed with how badly they fucked the whole thing up, then just skip it entirely, because it will make you mad.