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WWE Superstars - June 12, 2014

by Scrooge McSuck

- Courtesy of the WWE Network. It's in my contract that I sit through at least 4 episodes of Superstars per calendar year, so there you go. If anyone needs to be reminded of the pecking order, it goes Monday Night Raw (A), Smackdown (B), Main Event (C), and then Superstars. Without checking Spoilers (and I didn't), I can guarantee one awful Divas Match and something with 3MB...

Which brings me to the main reason I decided to choose this week to cover a "new" episode of WWE programming. For the first time in what feels like forever, WWE cut nearly a dozen performers in one big swoop throughout the day. The list is as followed: Drew McIntyre, Jinder Mahal, Brodus Clay, Evan Borune, Yoshi Tatsu, JTG (yes, JTG was finally discovered inside the air vents at Titan Towers), Curt Hawkins, Camacho, Theodore Long, Aksana (NOOOOOOOOOO!), and one of their faceless referees. Obviously, talent like Tatsu, JTG, and Hawkins, who are almost never used, even down at NXT, are better off elsewhere, but I'm a bit surprised by the release of Brodus Clay and Drew McIntyre. The latter had his pink slipped signed when he started doing TV jobs to a midget, but talk about wasted potential, although I guess it's too little, too late, as he improved too far past the point of being "saved" by the Machine. There's always J-e-Double F Wrestling for the WWE cast-off... er... free agents to look forward to. Yes, I totally snubbed TNA.

Note: The teaser commercial before the stream includes no less than FIVE of the people on that cut list (unless I'm confusing Hunico with Camacho, then forgiveness please and make it four. 3MB is still in the opening video.)

- Tom Phillips and Byron Saxton are at ringside to call all the action, unless otherwise noted. Use #Superstars to interact with the other seven people watching the program!

Dolph Ziggler vs. Titus O'Neil:

I don't see this one being a show-stealer. How did Titus avoid being cut? Dude is pushing 40 and is just a really tall JTTS. Lockup, and O'Neil easily overpowers him. Ziggler with a dropkick, but a second rope body press is countered with a pair of back breakers. Either the crowd is hotter than normal or the canned reactions are in full effect. Titus with an over-the-shoulder back breaker for two. Ziggler tries to slug it out, but O'Neil continues to dominate. O'Neil puts Ziggler on the Body Vice, but the formerly hard-luck World Heavyweight Champion fights free and gets a boot up on a charge. Ziggler with a big time DDT for two! O'Neil avoids the Fame-Asser and connects with a big boot for two. Hard whip to the corner, O'Neil with an awkward pumphandle, but Ziggler counters with the Zig-Zag for the three count at 5:08. ZIGGLER WON A MATCH!? *1/2 Felt like a standard formula Randy Savage match: Babyface gets whooped the entire match, hits a big move out of nowhere, end. Short enough to not drag, but too short to go anywhere.

- Later tonight, Adam Rose makes his Superstars Debut (because Vince McMahon doesn't like him) against Heath Slater, the surviving member of 3MB (I guess he's the 1MB, again?).

- Last Monday on Raw... The Authority finally strip Daniel Bryan of the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. It sucks. I don't mean the storyline, I mean the fact that after so much was done and so much emotion poured into it, that a horribly timed injury that could mean the end of a career ruined one of the most feel good moments in WWE History. If Bryan were capable of working just the slightest, I would say keep the title on him, but any other person in the same scenario would've long been stripped of the title, and this was the only move they could make without putting the entire company in limbo. Because of the title being held up, there will be a Money in the Bank Ladder Match that will crown a NEW Undisputed Champion, rather than a Briefcase that guarantees a Championship Match within the next year.

- "Earlier Today", Byron Saxton interviews Heath Slater and "Joe Dirt's Little Brother" Hornswoggle. Oh, and there's Drew McIntyre and Jinder Mahal. Earlier in the week on Raw, 3MB were slaughtered by the remaining members of The Shield. Slater puts over his upcoming match with Adam Rose.

- Last Monday on Raw... Seth Rollins explained himself for turning his back on Dean Ambrose and Roman Reigns. I have to admit, that really did surprise me, and I'm even more surprised the interest isn't there that I was expecting. News going around is that Rollins won't be joining Evolution, nor will a new member of The Shield will be introduced. That's just stupid. Rollins taking over as "the future" spot of Evolution, bumping Orton into Hunter's old "present star" role, and Hunter into the legend spot, wouldn't be near the worst thing in the world, and an open slot for the Shield would be a great time to bring up Sami Zayn, since smart fans can buy him joining the group and he would be the work-rate/high spot guy that Rollins used to be. I'm not burying the angle, but I'm just curious where we go from here. Rollins ends up calling out The Shield, but are met in the ring by Rowan and Harper, instead. Super-Cena makes the save, of course.

- "Tomorrow" night on Friday Night Smackdown, the US Champion Sheamus faces Cesaro in a Non-Title Rematch from Payback. That should be an easy ***1/2 match.

Adam Rose (w/ The Rose Buds) vs. Heath Slater (w/ 3MB):

With all the roster cuts, I'm going to expect Adam Rose to be a mainstay on Superstars going forward. I see Adam Rose found an old pair of Christian's ridiculously over-sized sunglasses. 3MB don't even get an entrance. Poor guys. Rose head rolls his way out of a wristlock and keeps doing it around the ring, just because. Slater does it so he doesn't get shown up and gets rolled up for his troubles for two. Rose with a drop toe hold and a lot of spanking. Slater takes a breather, but Rose follows him out and kicks him in the face. We take a quick break to advertise WWE's "Don't Try This At Home" message. We return with Rose heading to the top rope and coming down with a body press for two. Criss-cross ends with Slater connecting on a jumping heel kick. He quickly grabs a sleeper hold, because that's what he does every match. The Rose Buds try to rally the crowd, but they are clearly sitting on their hands. Rose grabs a sleeper, but Slater counters with a back suplex for two. Slater comes off the top, blocks the boot, but gets kicked into the ropes and cradled for two. Creative spot to something I generally hate. Rose pounds away, hits an inverted atomic drop, and comes off the ropes with a swinging neck breaker. Hornswoggle sneaks in, only to have his wig pulled off, exposing he still hasn't cut the rest of his hair. Rose with the Party Foul, and the 3MB Saga is over at 7:32. *1/4 Typical underwhelming match featuring Heath Slater, and Adam Rose really didn't add much until his big comeback.

- Weird fatherhood.org commercial with ALBERTO DEL RIO. Just because he's a heel on television, doesn't mean he's a heel when it comes to being a supportive father. It would be a HELL of a prank if he wasn't a father at all, and is just a sappy commercial for the sake of a sappy commercial.

- We re-live the closing minutes of the big Main Event from Raw between The Shield and John Cena against the Wyatt Family. It was good. That's some deep recapping, huh?

Final Thoughts: I keep forgetting how much of a recap show Superstars has become. The two exclusive matches were undercard filler that I wouldn't bother going out of my way to see, but the stuff that was recapped from Monday Night Raw was some solid stuff to advance the storyline surrounding the WWE World Heavyweight Championship and the break-up between The Shield. I think I'd still watch Main Event and Superstars back-to-back than sitting through a full three hours of Monday Night Raw.

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