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WWE Main Event - June 19, 2013

by Scrooge McSuck

- Last Week on WWE Main Event... The Miz defeated Cody Rhodes in his quest to become the Next Intercontinental Champion (Spoiler: He didn't), Damian Sandow defeated Sin Cara in his quest to defeat Sheamus on the YouTube Warm-Up to Paybackô (Spoiler: He didn't), and the Uso's defeated Tons of Funk in their quest to challenging The Shield for the Tag Team Titles (Spoiler: They still haven't). Can this weeks episode of Main Event top last weeks effort?

- Originally taped on June 18th, 2013 from Dayton, OH. Wasn't that the location of King of the Ring '93? Josh Mathews and The Miz are on commentary to call all the action unless otherwise noted. I guess that threesome with Ricardo Rodriguez won't happen anymore, what with the heel turn of Alberto Del Rio (and justifiably so... I liked him, but he was NOT getting over as a babyface), so he's replaced with... Cody Rhodes? Well, that's random, but last week we had Wade Barrett on commentary, so you never know.

The Shield vs. Jimmy & Jey Uso and Justin Gabriel:

We've got Six-Man Tag Team Action, and yay, three weeks straight of Uso's in action. I'm just this close to crapping my pants with excitement. I have a funny feeling Gabriel is taking the fall in this one. To be fair, this is nice continuity to a few weeks ago when Gabriel teamed with the Uso's to defeat 3MB in a pretty substandard match. Ambrose and Gabriel start. They fight over a waistlock. Ambrose with a shoulder tackle, but a criss-cross ends with Gabriel putting him down with a dropkick. Gabriel avoids double teaming, but Rollins remains in control. Whip to the corner, Gabriel ends up on the apron and springs in with a body press for two. Jey Uso in with a sledge from the top rope. Jimmy tags in for a double elbow in the corner. He sends Rollins to the corner and connects with a jumping forearm. He sets for the butt to the face, but Rollins gets pulled to the floor to set up a commercial break.

Brodus Clay with an entertaining "Don't Try This At Home" (don't call my momma telling her I wasn't safe.") Back to the action, and Gabriel is taking a pounding from Reigns. He gets trapped in the Shield's corner, but somehow fights his way out and tags out to Jimmy Uso. He connects with a pair of forearms on Reigns, followed by a crescent kick. Criss-cross, and a hard right from Reigns allows the Uso to work the inside-out oversell. Ambrose in with a series of stomps across the chest, followed by a snap elbow drop for two. Jimmy offers a comeback, but gets taken over with a snapmare, and it's time for a chinlock. Jimmy quickly escapes, only to take a knee to the midsection. Rollins pounds him down to the canvas and tags out to Reigns, who plants him with a hard slam and puts the boots to him in the corner. Snapmare and chinlock, and I will again complain you don't need this much resting in a 6-Man. Jimmy tries to dive over Reigns to make the tag, but gets dropped on his head. He connects with a crescent kick, and in comes Jey Uso, unloading on Ambrose . Whip to the ropes and a Samoan drop, followed by a full nelson buster to Rollins. Ambrose takes the butt to the face, but it only gets two. We get a double body press spot, with both men selling it equally. Gabriel tags in to go for the 450 splash as the Uso's take out Reigns and Rollins in some nice highspot fashion, but Ambrose recovers, knocks Gabriel off the top rope, and the Stroke finishes him at 8:07. That finish just came out of nowhere. Very rushed. Surprisingly, the Uso's were more impressive this week than anyone else. The Shield were in second-gear and Gabriel hardly factored into the match.

- Incase you missed it, CM Punk made his return to WWE action at Payback, defeated Chris Jericho in a solid 4-star performance in front of his homecrowd of Chicago, IL. On Monday Night Raw, he relieved Paul Heyman from his unofficial duties and took on NEW World Heavyweight Champion Alberto Del Rio in a non-Title Match. To the surprise of nobody, Brock Lesnar made his presence felt, laying out CM Punk with the F5. Like I mentioned in the weeks leading up to this, I already have commited myself to ordering SummerSlam on the grounds we get Punk vs. Lesnar. Oh, and inbetween all that chaos, Dolph Ziggler showed up to get him some of Del Rio for what happend at Payback.

Sin Cara vs. Antonio Cesaro (w/ Zeb Colter):

When did Cesaro and Zeb form an alliance? I guess giving Cesaro a decent mouthpiece is enough to remove the stigma that he's "boring"? I use quotes because that's such a ridiculous belief that anyone can find one of the best wrestlers boring. I guess we're lucky they haven't rehashed that Lance Storm angle from 2003. Remember when Steve Austin took a nap during his match? Didn't Zeb Colter cut the same promo on Sin Cara in the weeks leading up to WrestleMania XXIX? Lockup, and Cesaro throws him down. He stomps away at the chest as we discuss the hypocritical nature of Colter. Sin Cara comes back with a pair of arm drags, sending Cesaro to the floor. Back inside, Cesaro goes back to working him over. Whip to the ropes, Sin Cara with a hurricanrana. Cesaro sends him to the apron and hangs him up across the top rope. He talks some trash before throwing Sin Cara into the security wall to set up a commercial break.

We come back, with Cesaro grinding Sin Cara to the canvas with a chinlock, the most electrifying rest-hold in Sports-Entertainment, today! Sin Cara battles free, only to be taken over with a powerslam for a two count. Cesaro mounts him with a series of rights, takes him over with a snapmare, and connects on the double stomp across the chest. He follows that up with the dead-lift gutwrench suplex. Cesaro teases to pull off the mask, but Sin Cara kicks him in the face. Cody Rhodes with more continuity, referencing when he tried (and failed). Sin Cara mounts the comeback and takes him over with the whirling head scissors. He sends Cesaro to the floor with an arm drag, and follows with a high body press from the top rope. Sin Cara with a slingshot corkscrew for a two count. Cesaro counters the handspring elbow and slaps on that chinlock once again, wearing Sin Cara down. Sin Cara escapes with a jawbuster and connects with an enziguri. He heads to the top, and they somehow don't blow the head scissors into a cover spot. Whip to the ropes, Cesaro hits the uppercut from out of nowhere, but it only gets two. Cesaro grabs the cginlock again, and swings Sin Cara around with it, Ken Patera style. Cesaro lets go, quickly connects with the Neutralizer, and that gets the three count at 8:27. There was a styles clash at times, and it took a few minutes, but they warmed up and put on a pretty good match when it was all said and done. Nice to see them finally get more than three-minutes together.

Kaitlyn vs. Aksana:

It's a rematch from Friday Night Smackdown, when Kaitlyn snapped and the match never really got to start proper. I'm guessing we won't get a nip slip from Kaitlyn this week on Main Event, like we did on Monday Night Raw. I'll wait for all the nerds to google search it, because we all know some people will. Over/Under on the Star Rating: DUD. I'm going to go under (which means negatives). Aksana with a takedown and screaming. I think some terrible punches were thrown, too, I couldn't tell. Aksana with a pair of elbow drops and a AWFUL cross-face chicken-wing. Bob Backlund would be spinning in his grave. Aksana with a side suplex that would make Dino Bravo roll... nevermind. Aksana covers for two and goes back to the stupid chinlock. Kaitlyn doesn't even try to bother selling it, she just looks bored. Aksana hits the ropes at 2 mph, allowing Kaitlyn to somehow counter with a weak back breaker. Clothesline and elbow, followed by a facebuster. Charge misses so badly, you could've taken a bathroom break in between it. Kaitlyn won't be denied, though, and still hits the spear for three at 3:26. We'll be nice and just call it a DUD, but that might be me being generous.

- Raw Rewind: Mark Henry comes out to announce his retirement, and I must say that was a very convincing speech, as he's got the crowd in the palm of his hands. It was good enough that Cena hanging around for the entire thing didn't make anyone question why he was there, until Mark Henry laid him out to no doubt set up the Main Event at TLC '13. If Henry's retirement were legit, I must say, I thought at one point he was one of the worst workers in history, but he definitely got better, especially when they stopped booking him like a joke and gave him a serious push as an indestructable heel.

Final Thoughts: Not the greatest show for wrestling, but to be fair, Payback and Raw were both outstanding, so riding that kind of streak can be a bit difficult. The opening 6-Man Tag was entertaining, if unspectacular, and we got a solid match between Cesaro and Sin Cara, but there wasn't a big main event type match to draw my attention, and that women's match, while short, was still a pile of steaming crap. The Raw Recaps were actually the best part of the night, which again shows how good WWE can be when done right.

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