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WWE Main Event - February 13, 2013

by Scrooge McSuck

- Holy horrible video presentation... I've seen better quality streaming online back in the days of using AOL 6.0. Michael Cole and JBL are calling all the action tonight, unless otherwise noted.

- Chris Jericho comes out for the first ever "episode" of the Highlight Reel on WWE Main Event. He was supposed to interview the Miz, but Antonio Cesaro beat the ever-loving crap out of him on Monday Night Raw. My God, I would pay a good $50 to watch Miz get his ass whooped for three hours straight. Instead, he brings out World Heavyweight Champion Alberto Del Rio... he's hyping the title defense against the Big Show, which turns into Jericho talking trash about winning the Elimination Chamber and winning the World Heavyweight Title at WrestleMania XXIX. They trade words in Spanish, and now Ricardo gets in on the debate. Is this supposed to be intentionally funny, because it kind of was.

Then things turn to crap as Dolph Ziggler comes out with his skank and scary black guy. I used to like Ziggler, but the company he keeps is REALLY uninteresting (Big E?) or really annoying (AJ). "You have an E for a name?!" Jericho runs through a list of "insulting" wrapped around the "Big E" name, most of which make no sense, but he's trying. End result: Dolph vs. Del Rio. Tonight. On Main Event.

Alberto Del Rio (w/ Ricardo Rodriguez) vs. Dolph Ziggler (w/ The Usual):

Non-Title Match, of course, but Ziggler DOES have the briefcase, so you never know when the lazy creative team will remember that. There's got to be a crap finish to this... it's just begging for one. Lockup to start, with neither man gaining control. Del Rio with a side headlock and takeover. Whip to the ropes, Del Rio with a shoulder tackle, followed by a hip toss for a two count. Ziggler quickly squirms to the arena floor for a breather. Back inside, Ziggler lays into Del Rio with boots and rights. Del Rio turns the tide and charges in with a kick to the chest for another two count. Ziggler counters a suplex with one of his own and chokes Del Rio across the bottom rope. Ziggler with a neck breaker for barely a one count, then slaps on a chinlock. Del Rio with a comeback until taking a knee to the midsection. Del Rio with a snapmare and kick to the kidneys for a two count. He hooks an armbar as Michael Cole tells us the rules of the Elimination Chamber. So intervals are no 4-minutes? Ok, then. Del Rio presses Ziggler about 8 feet into the air, but misses a charge and meets the post.

Back from commercial break, Ziggler connects with another neckbreaker, then drops a series of elbows. That gets a two count, and it's back to the armbar. Del Rio fights free with headbutts, but runs into a dropkick. Whip to the corner, WITH AUTHORITY. He measures up and connects with another dropkick for a two count. Three times ain't a charm, and he does the Hennig bump into the ring post. Someone was a fan of Curt Hennig... and yes, I'm aware he works that spot into most of his matches. Sue me for calling attention to it for once. Del Rio charges, and takes a back drop to the floor. So much for that comeback. Mild "Alberto" chant as Ziggler rolls him back in and covers for two. Ziggler to the top rope, and he ends up getting crotched waiting too long. Del Rio climbs up with him and takes him down with a reverse super-plex... that was awesome. Turning point of the match, and convenient time for another commercial break!

Back again, with the two exchanging blows. Ziggler hits yet another dropkick to end the slugfest. He works in the Hennig spot AGAIN, and Del Rio blows through him with clotheslines. He catches Zig' off the ropes with a tilt-o-whirl back breaker, then comes out of the corner with a well placed kick to the face for a two count. He signals for the Cross-Armbreaker, but Ziggler escapes and plants Del Rio with a DDT for two. Del Rio works the lower back with forearms and connects with the Backstabber for two. Finally, AJ gets involved, putting the foot on the ropes. Ziggler hits the Fame-Asser out of nowhere, but it only gets two. I almost thought he had it won. Del Rio with a mild Hulk Up, ramming a knee into the bicep of Ziggler. He misses a charge to the corner, and Ziggler slaps on a sleeper hold. Del Rio throws Ziggler off and hits the running enziguri for a two count. He signals for the finish, again, but Ziggler shoves him into the ropes, right into a cheap shot from Langston. Ricardo hits Big E. with the bucket, but it's no sold and we get a chase back to the locker room. Ziggler goes for the Zig-Zag, but Del Rio counters with the Cross Armbreaker, and Ziggler taps at 21:46 (including the two commercial breaks). At times there felt like a styles clash, and it was a little long for what they were going for, but there was also some decent action peppered throughout, a good sequence to close things, and hey, for once the people at ringside got physically involved, and yet we still got a clean finish.

- Last Monday on Raw, the Rock and CM Punk had an altercation that ended with Punk giving Rock the GTS and stealing the WWE Championship. After all, he DID defeat the Rock at the Royal Rumble, and was celebrating day 449 as WWE champion. The rematch finally takes place at Elimination Chamber, with the added stipulation that if Rock loses by DQ or Count-Out, he loses the title.

The Elimination Chamber is coming to us live on Pay-Per-View this Sunday night. As of this broadcast, here is the announced card that we'll have the honor of spending 45 bones on...

  • CM Punk challenges the Rock for his WWE Championship, in what should be Day 455 as the reigning Champion.
  • Alberto Del Rio defends the World Heavyweight Championship against the Big Show.
  • The Elimination Chamber includes Chris Jericho, Mark Henry, Kane, Daniel Bryan, Randy Orton, and... Jack Swagger. That one seems right out of left field.
  • The Super Team of John Cena, Ryback, and Sheamus take on the Shield in Six-Man Tag Team Action.
  • Pre-Show on WWE.com: Brodus Clay and Tensai (or as JBL calls them, the Future Endeavors) take on the Rhodes Scholars... so much for that break up. Lasted all of three weeks. For a card where only four matches are formally announced, they're all main event caliber. Much more than I expected for a throw-away PPV between the Rumble and WrestleMania. I won't be ordering it, but I can see it having some enticement value for casual fans.

- Matt Striker is with the Voice of the Voice of the Voiceless, Paul Heyman, clutching the WWE Championship BELT. Punk is training hard for the rematch he's granted the Rock, and will retain his WWE Championship at the Elimination Chamber. What false advertisement... I demand to see CM Punk!

- Fandango is coming to WWE. I made my big argument about this on Da' Board, but for those who didn't, here it is again: What purpose does Fandango have to even exist as a character? He's already tagged to never make it past opening match comedy act, and honestly, why does WWE need more of them? Second, why is he a heel? He;s obviously being promoted as a heel by the way he looks, but why, because he DANCES? Seriously, this is Abe Knuckleball Schwartz level of bad when it comes to character development: Telling us who to boo or cheer, based solely on their hobbies/other occupation. It's stupid, doesn't sell tickets, doesn't draw ratings, and serves zero purpose. And that, my friends, is the only time I will devote a whole paragraph explaining why Fandango is a stupid gimmick before the guy makes his official television debut.

- We replay the Shield/SuperCena and Friends confrontation on Monday Night Raw. Order the Elimination Chamber now!

Final Thoughts: The hard-sell for Elimination Chamber was in full effect here. We got promos to open the show hyping the Elimination Chamber as well as the World Heavyweight Title Match, followed the only match on the broadcast with recaps and a promo hyping Rock/Punk II, and the ending segment is a replay of the last build up for the 6-Man Tag. Good work in selling the PPV, and the match featured tonight was a solid, main event caliber contest with a clean finish. I could've done without the Highlight Reel being sold as a reason to watch, but we got decent television for an hour, so no complaints here.

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