WWF at Madison Square Garden - December 28, 1989
by Scrooge McSuck
- I'm not 100% sure, but I might have done a super-rush job quickie review of this show before, but since I have absolutely no memory of doing that, here we go with a full version. We're in the middle of the weird time when all the angles to build up WrestleMania are either just getting started, or not started at all, and pretty much everything else was just time filler.
- Our broadcast team for tonight consists of Gorilla Monsoon and Hillbilly Jim, with Lord Alfred Hayes doing the roaming interviewer role. Surprisingly, HBJ was NOT that bad on commentary, compared to some of the other options available, but he still wasn't that good either. Gorilla seemed to like him enough, or maybe he just had great chemistry with everyone.
Note: This card featured a midget match, featuring Little Tokyo and Cowboy Catrell (looking like a mini-version of Ron Bass) taking on the tandom of Little Cocco and "Karate" Chris Dube (looking like a mini-version of Ricky Steamboat). I really hate trying to recap midget matches, so I'm excluding it from the review. If you need to know, Cocco and Dube dog piled on top of Catrell and Tokyo for a cheap victory at 12:07. Yes, the match featured the obvious comedy spots, like biting of the butt and referee being treated like a prop.
- Tito Santana vs. Bob Bradley:
Not the greatest match to start the show off with, but Tito seemed to be wrestling on the majority of MSG shows during his career. Bradley with some extended trash talking. Santana surprises him with an atomic drop and dropkick, forcing Bradley out of the ring for a breather. Lockup, and Santana takes Bradley over with a hip toss. Santana with a series of arm drags, and Bradley rolls out of the ring, again. Santana with a sling shot to bring him back in the ring, then follows with a scoop slam and applies a side headlock. Bradley finally escapes, but Santana puts him down with a clothesline, then goes right back to the headlock. Santana maintains control, doing nothing much of note, as Gorilla and Hillbilly discuss what Granny made for the holidays, in great detail. Santana takes Bradley over with a head scissors, then goes to the chinlock. Bradley finally mounts some offense, putting Santana down with an inverted atomic drop, then drops an elbow across the chest. Bradley chokes Santana across ropes, then sits down across the back. Bradley with a weak looking tombstone piledriver, but Santana is up at two, so Bradley goes to the hold of the night, the chinlock, to keep him down. Santana tries to power his way free, but Bradley yanks him down by the hair and keeps the hold applied. Santana with elbows to the midsection, but a knee from Bradley quickly haults his comeback. Gorilla compares Bradley to Rene Goulet, and that's NOT a good thing. Goulet, HBJ reminds us, was his first opponent as a professional wrestler (in the WWF Universe). Bradley shows off some cat-like moves, missing a splash attempt. Santana fires away with rights, but misses a charge in the corner. Bradley chokes away, then plays to the crowd before applying a front facelock. Bradley with a scoop slam, then he heads to the second turnbuckle, and misses a diving headbutt. Santana with a series of rights and lefts, followed by a clothesline. Santana stomps away with extreme aggression, then rams his head back into the canvas. Irish whip, and Santana takes him over with a back body drop. Santana calls for the end, and the flying forearm is enough for the three count at 14:28. 3/4* Just way too long for a match between what was basically a JTTS and a syndicated show jobber. This could've easily been trimmed down by five minutes, at least.
- Brutus "The Barber" Beefcake vs. "The Model" Rick Martel:
Here's a perfect example of a feud that had zero blow-off on television. From what I remember, Beefcake had torn apart some of Martel's designer clothes on an episode of Superstars, and bam, instant feud over style. This probably would've been a better option for Wrestlemania VI than Martel and Koko doing a worthless match and putting Beefcake over Mr. Perfect, but that's just my opinion. Martel plays the game of stalling the second the bell rings. Martel looks way too ripped for the body he was sporting a few years earlier and during his final days in the WWF. Martel charges Beefcake, but gets taken over with a hip toss and slam. Irish whip, and Martel runs out of the ring. Handshakes are offered, but it's Beefcake with the sucker punch. Beefcake applies a headlock, then jerks the head of Martel between his knees. Martel counters mounted punches in the corner with an inverted atomic drop. Martel with some choking, followed by stomps to the lower back. Snapmare into a reverse chinlock by the Model. Gorilla and HBJ must be bored, because they talk about the fairness of the (somewhat) recently reinstated referee, Danny Davis, who is in the ring for the match, just to let everyone know. We get the "if his arm drops one more time..." crap, with Beefcake having a seizure to try and sell his miracle comeback. Beefcake with elbows to the midsection, followed by a shoulder block. He tries for another, but Martel drives a knee into his gut, then drops a knee across the chest for a two count. Martel stomps the back some more, but Beefcake keeps fighting back. Beefcake with a surprise small package for a two count. Martel with more stomping, followed by a side back breaker. He heads to the top rope, but Beefcake manages to shake the ropes and crotch him across the top turnbuckle. Beefcake, who has no sense of a high spot, simply punches Martel to bring him down from the turnbuckle. Beefcake with an inverted atomic drop, followed by a regular atomic drop and a clothesline, sending him out of the ring. Beefcake follows him out and does the usual garbage stuff he can do. Beefcake tries a sunset flip back into the ring, but Martel blocks, grabs the ropes, and gets the three count at 12:38. The referee tries to question Martel about it after the match, but we just get a slugfest until Beefcake traps him in the sleeper hold. No haircut, though, with a little help being woken up by Bobby Heenan. 1/2* Match was just not very good. Beefcake was, to be generous, a below-par worker at best, and I just never cared for Martel's matches (or anything, for that matter) during his days as "The Model."
- Tugboat Thomas vs. Dale Wolfe: This must have been right around the time Tugboat debuted on T.V., as he has a last name, and his ring attire isn't his signature bright red and white candy-cane striped top. Dale Wolfe was formerly Dusty Wolfe, but with Dusty Rhodes in the WWF now, he gets a name change that would stick for the remainder of his stay as a Jobber. Lockup into the corner, and Tugboat squashes him. Wolfe tries a shoulder block, but he ends up going down, instead. Tugboat does a lot of tooting, then sends Wolfe out of the ring with his own shoulder block. Tugboat slingshots Wolfe back into the ring. Wolfe with a thumb to the eyes and applies a headlock, but Tugboat carries him into the opposite corner and catches him coming off with a bearhug. Wolfe rakes the eyes to escape, then hammers on him, quite weakly. Tugboat tosses Wolfe into the corner, and throws him across the ring with a lazy hip toss. Whip to the corner, and Tugboat follows in with an avalanche. Tugboat comes off the ropes with a big splash, and it's all over at 2:29. DUD Just a squash match, but at least it felt like a squash match, instead of trying to stretch it out for 10-12 minutes. Tugboat's tenture on WWF T.V. seemed to stall almost as soon as he debuted, until right after WrestleMania, when he was quickly pushed up to near-main event status as a sidekick to Hulk Hogan.
No Disqualification Match:
Jake "The Snake" Roberts vs. "The Million Dollar Man" Ted Dibiase:
One of the "Hot" angles at the time. This was set up following Wrestlemania V, when Dibiase "injured" Jake Roberts following a post-match beat down. When Roberts came back, it was on like Donkey Kong. Virgil is barred from ringside for this match, no doubt because he probably interfered in a previous match between these two. I'm pretty sure that this was right before Roberts stole the Million $ Belt, but that has nothing to do with this match. Dibiase is hailing from the Netherlands Antilles for his winter residance. Danny Davis is obsessed with ringing the bell the second the babyface hits the ring, with Dibiase already on the floor getting counted-out. Lockup to start, and Dibiase with a huge right across the back of the neck of Roberts. They trade off wristlocks, and again Dibiase goes to the neck. Dibiase with a side headlock, and they work into the wristlocks. Roberts fights back with his signature jabs, but Dibiase escapes a DDT attempt, and rolls out of the ring. Back in the ring, Dibiase drives a knee to the midsection, followed by elbows to the neck. Whip to the corner is reversed, and now Roberts is pounding away on the back of Dibiase's neck, then takes him down with a wristlock. Roberts continues to work the arm of Dibiase, as Monsoon claims how nice of a guy Roberts is, and how he does so much community service. We can all write in our own joke, by the way. Roberts with his second failed attempt to finish off Dibiase. Roberts drags Dibiase back in the ring and works the arm s'more. There's not a whole lot of PBP to do, but it's not because nothing's happening, it's just not worth noting all of it. They slug it out a bit, with Dibiase seeming to come out on top of the exchange, but Roberts won't let go of the arm he's been working over like crazy for the last few minutes. Dibiase with a rake of the eyes, and a collision sees Roberts get caught in the ropes, a move he no doubt learned from his feud with Andre the Giant. Dibiase has the opening he needed, and pounds away on Roberts. Dibiase with some trash talking, then drives a series of knees and elbows into the neck. Dibiase with a swinging neck breaker followed by another knee drop. Dibiase seems to enjoy taunting Roberts, who was always good at taking an ass kicking. Roberts crawls to his feet, and Dibiase quickly plants him with a piledriver. He takes forever to make a cover, and by the time he does, he only gets a two count, as Roberts puts a foot on the ropes. Dibiase clubs away on Roberts, then applies a reverse chinlock, using the occasional body leverage to try and keep it from being a boring rest-hold. Roberts fights back with elbows and hip tosses Dibiase away, but Dibiase pops right back up and floors Roberts with a clothesline. Dibiase stomps away on him and covers for a two count, then goes back to the chinlock. Dibiase keeps working the neck and covers for another two count. Dibiase to the second rope, and comes off, missing an axehandle, as Roberts rolled out of the ring. Dibiase follows out, then back in, and Roberts catches him with a knee lift. Roberts with a series of jabs, then a whip to the corner. Dibiase with a knee to the face on a charge attempt, though. Dibiase applies his Million Dollar Dream, but Roberts is aware enough to grab the ropes to have the hold broken, even though there's no disqualifications. The action goes back outside again, with Roberts yanking Dibiase into the ring post. Back inside, and Roberts comes off the ropes with a super high-knee. Short-arm clothesline connects, and we all know what follows that. Roberts plants him with the DDT, and covers for the clean 1-2-3 at 18:38. Couldn't be any more clean than that. Afterwards, Roberts lets Damian free from the ominous green bag and tries to take Dibiase's belt, but Virgil attacks to save his boss and get the belt back from Roberts' clutches. *** Surprisingly good match, compared to other matches these two had around the time. Nothing earth shattering, but the resting wasn't too bad, the crowd was hot, there was some psychology to it, and a oddly clean finish, for a change.
- Koko B. Ware vs. Iron Mike Sharpe:
We're really show-casing a lot of jobbers on this show, now adding Sharpe to the list of Bob Bradley and Dale "Don't Call Me Dusty" Wolfe, and we all know Koko is only a booger's flick away from their classification, too (See also: Tito Santana). Koko is sporting bleach-blonde hair and some goofy paint job on the sides of his head, trying to look (kinda) like a parrot, I guess. I never understood the idea of African-American wrestlers having bleached hair, but that's probably because I'm not a racist wrestling promoter. I've seen enough matches between these two to expect nothing but boredom. Koko ducks a clothesline, sending Sharpe to the arena floor. Koko with a hip toss and arm drag, sending Sharpe out of the ring again. Sharpe is quite possibly the loudest jobber in the history of wrestling. Lockup into the corner, and Koko avoids a roundhouse right, frustrating Sharpe further. Sharpe applies a side headlock, then puts Koko down with a shoulder block. Criss-cross time, and Koko eventually takes Sharpe over with a hip toss. Lockup into the corner, and Sharpe takes control with clubbering blows and choking. This just keeps going on, with no end in view. Koko tries an atomic drop, but collapses under the weight of Sharpe. Either that was a bad blown spot, or it's part of the match. Sharpe quickly just punches him, so I'm saying blown spot. Irish whip, and Koko with a sunset flip for a two count. Small package by the Birdman for another two count. Irish whip, and Koko catches a boot from Sharpe, then connects with a dropkick for two, again. Irish whip, and Sharpe with a forearm across the back of the head, as Monsoon with some subtle comments that seems to poke at the not-so-goodness of the match. Oh, and the loud "Boring" chant isn't obvious, either. Koko rams Sharpe into the turnbuckle, then Sharpe rakes the eyes. Sharpe with shoulders to the midsection. Irish whip to the corner, and Koko comes back out with a cross body for a two count. Sloppy piledriver by Sharpe as Hillbilly compares Sharpe to the other Iron Mike, Mike Tyson. Koko hangs up Sharpe across the top rope, then dumps him out of the ring. Ware hammers away on him and slams him on the floor. Back inside, and Koko finishes Sharpe off with the Ghostbuster (brain buster suplex) for the three count at 12:07. DUD Terrible match, but I'm not going to dip into the negatives for it. Just don't ever watch a match between these two, ever.
- WWF Tag Team Championship Match:
The Colossal Connection © (w/ Bobby Heenan) vs. Demolition:
(Andre The Giant & Haku vs. Ax & Smash)
A match I've surprisingly been looking forward to watching. Andre and Haku had won the titles from Demolition no less than two weeks earlier, and are introduced to the crowd as the "NEW" Tag Team Champions. This was during Andre's last hurrah in the WWF, as Haku worked most of the match, with Andre doing his occasional big spot before bowing out to the apron. Alway sad to see how bad of shape Andre was in at this point. Haku and Smash start. Lockup into the corner, and they trade blows, with Haku coming out on top of that exchange, pounding Smash down to the canvas. Irish whip is reversed, and Haku misses an elbow drop, allowing Smash to do what he does best, and that's smash 'em. Ax tags in, and he does his best to pound Haku into Jell-o. Wristlock applied, and Smash tags in to work Haku over some more. Haku continues to get work over, until KO'ing Smash with a roundhouse kick. Haku with a reverse kick, and Andre tags in for the first time, and misses an attempt to drop ass. Ax tags in, and pounds away on the already fallen giant. Smash comes in, and they double team pound Andre. Ax kicks clobbering him then throws in some choking. Andre keeps trying to fight back, but Demolition takes advantage with quick tags. Andre eventually floors Ax with a shot to the throat, but Ax is determined, and stomps away in the corner. The match is sucking, but the crowd is enjoying Demolition' dominance of Andre. As I say that, Andre boots Ax once in the face and once to the chest to finally get up. Smash quickly ties him up near the ropes, opening him up for Ax to beat on. Smash tags in, and gets put down with a chop. Ax tags in and chokes in the corner. Andre with a knee to the chest, followed by his signature headbutt. Haku tags back in, and hammers away. Ax surprises him with an atomic drop, but doesn't have it in him to make the tag. Irish whip, and Haku connects with a dropkick for a two count. Andre tags in and chokes Ax with his singlet strap. Choking in the corner, followed by shoulders to the midsection. Haku misses a charge to the corner, but Andre kicks Ax for fun on his way out of the ring. Whip to the corner, and Haku runs into an elbow from Ax. Smash gets the hot tag, and takes Haku over with a back drop. Smash with a scoop slam, followed by an elbow drop. Andre comes in, and gets a clothesline for his troubles. Smash with a clothesline to Haku, and now he pounds away on Andre while Ax takes care of Haku. Andre recovers to headbutt Smash in the back of the head, then dumps him out of the ring. Smash is selling like he's dead, and he's counted-out at 11:12. Yeck. Demolition attack post-match, and clears the ring with a clothesline on Andre, then finish off Haku with their signature move for their own three count. 1/2* Match wasn't very good, but the crowd was into it at least, and I managed not to really hate it since only 1 of the 4 I'm not a fan of. Gotta' love being bias.
- While the cage is constructed for the main event, we cut to Sean Mooney, hyping the next show at the Garden, on January 15th, 1990. The Powers of Pain will take on the team of the Rockers, and we get Event Center promos from both teams. The PoP and Fuji are barely coherent, and speaking of incoherent, Jannetty is mumbling just as much, if not more. Mooney is standing by with Jake Roberts, and he will be taking on Ted Dibiase, AGAIN, on January 15th. Why? Jake just went over clean. There's no need for it! In the main event, Mr. Perfect will challenge Hulk Hogan for the WWF Championship, and we get promos from both of them. Again, I'm not sure, but I think I reviewed that card a long time ago.
- Main Event; Steel Cage Match:
"Rowdy" Roddy Piper vs. "Ravishing" Rick Rude (w/ Bobby Heenan):
I've reviewed this match a couple of times already thanks to Compilations and Coliseum Video, but I guess I'll do it ONE MORE TIME just because I care so much, and because that was back in the day of even more spelling mistakes and worse grammar. Roddy helped cost Rude the Intercontinental Title at Summerslam, and was also waging verbal wars with Heenan on Primetime Wrestling every week, so that was good enough to pair these two up for a few months to help reestablish Piper, coming back from his first of many retirements. You can win this match by either escaping the cage, or pinning or making your opponent submit. Oh, and it's the big blue bars cage, of course.
Rude attacks before the bell, pounding away. Piper blocks being rammed into the cage, but gets his eyes raked. Irish whip is reversed, and Rude takes a hard bump into the cage. Rude tries to climb out, but Piper whips him with his belt, instead. Piper with some mocking of Rude's hip swivel, then more whipping. Piper bites Rude to take him down, and works that for quite a bit. Piper allows Rude to make a half-hearted attempt to climb out, but yanks him down by the tights and throws him face first into the cage. Piper makes an attempt to escape, but it seems like he's more worried about talking trash to Heenan, allowing Rude to pull him down, dropping him across the top rope. Rude has done a blade job while the camera kept it's attention to Piper and Heenan. Rude goes for the door, but Piper snags the ankle, and holds on, despite Rude's attempt to break free. Rude instead covers after a series of blows, but only for a two count, and Piper STILL has the ankle. Heenan tries helping pull Rude out, but Piper uses the trunks, yanking them WAY the fuck down, and they stay in that position the rest of the match, sadly. Piper unloads with a series of rights, but Rude with a knee to the chest, and he nails the Rude Awakening out of nowhere. Rude is slow to his feet, and he plays the "I can't see where I am" card as he crawls for the door, but he gets their with the help of Heenan's guidance. Piper stops the escape and goes for the door himself, but to no avail. Irish whip, and a collision puts both men down. Monsoon rides the referee for doing a count-out spot. Both men climb up the same side of the cage, and after a few blows are exchanged, both touch the floor, so the match MUST RESUME with both men back in the ring. Rude grabs a chair and bashes Piper good, just for the heck of it, then tosses him back in the ring. Rude with a snapmare and knee drop, then he climbs up to the top of the cage, and comes off with his signature fist drop. Piper sells it like he just OD'ed or something, but manages to kick out at two. Rude connects with a piledriver, then climbs up to the top of the cage again. This time he gets crotched across the top, thanks to Piper shaking on the wall. Piper hangs Rude upside down on the cables at the top of the cage, but gets the door slammed in his face, courtesy of the Weasel, as he tried to exit out the door. Piper manages to free himself, but a pin attempt only gets two, again. Rude with a back suplex, and both men are down and out. The camera catches Heenan digging into his pocket, then hands of a concealed weapon to Rude. Piper blocks the cheap shot, grabs the weapon of choice, and nails Rude square between the eyes™. Piper calls for the door, and just like that, he's out and declared the winner at 12:56. I don't know if these cages matches were the blow-off to their feud on the house show circuit, but by Royal Rumble time, Piper was thrown into a program with Bad News Brown, and Rude was put on the back-burner before being pushed into an oddly concieved World Title feud with the Ultimate Warrior. *** Not a great match by any stretch of the imagination, but it was pretty fun,had some good spots, the crowd seemed to really dig it, and it never had a long, drawn out moment like a lot of cage matches had. Good way to send the crowd home happy, too.
Final Thoughts: One of those shows that you can flip a coin on. The two big matches (Rude/Piper and Dibiase/Roberts) were both really good and worth checking out, but the other matches featuring superstar vs. superstar were both pretty bad in terms of actual wrestling. The undercard is a complete wash, featuring a midget tag match and three matches that would best be suited as 90-second squashes on an episode of Wrestling Challenge. The four top of the card matches that all had something to them in terms of backstory, so in terms of nostalgia, this might be worth giving a look over, and you can enjoy a couple of pretty good matches, as well.
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