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WWF at Meadowlands Arena
by Scrooge McSuck
June 11, 1995
We've hit Nassau, we've hit Madison Square Garden. Welcome to the Meadowlands Arena as the WWF finishes its loop of the New York/New Jersey market and prepares for an overseas tour (because that is where they can make substantial money for live events at this point). Like the MSG card, we're missing quite a bit of the undercard: Jean Pierre Lafitte def. Duke Droese, Adam Bomb def. Henry Godwinn, Alundra Blayze def. Berthe Faye, and Hunter Hearst Helmsley def. Aldo Montoya didn't make the cut, sorry.
WWF Tag Team Championship; 2 out of 3 Falls Match:
Owen Hart & Yokozuna (c) (w/ Mr. Fuji) vs. The Smoking Gunns:
How I adore the gimmick of 2 out of 3 Falls. Unfortunately, in the modern era, WWE almost always does it poorly. Fall #1: Owen and Yoko attack before the bell and toss Bart. Whip to the ropes, Owen with a drop toe hold and Yokozuna with a leg drop for three at 0:36. OK, so WWE was doing these quick fall bullsh*t in 1995, too.
Fall #2: Owen continues putting the boots to Billy, who plays dead as well as anyone could, except maybe Bart a few years later at WrestleMania XV. Owen snags a cowboy hat from the attendant at ringside and the Champions goof around, drawing the ire of the Cowboys. Billy and Bart run wild with mounted corner rights on both Owen and Yoko until Hebner chases Billy out of the ring. Bart with a whip and press slam on Owen, followed by a knee drop across the face for two. Owen flips through a wristlock and slaps Billy across the face. Billy with a side headlock and slap of his own. Yoko tags in to fight Owen's battle for him, and now Billy goofs around, doing the sumo pose. Yoko runs through him with a shoulder tackle and shows him how it's really done. Lockup and Billy goes to work on the arm. Bart tags in and immediately gets nailed from Owen on the apron. Owen with a hangman's neck breaker for two. Bart with a jawbreaker to escape a chin-lock and comes off the ropes with a sunset flip for two. Owen quickly recovers and hits a clothesline for two. Enzuigiri for two. Crisscross and they knock heads in the middle of the ring. Billy with the hot tag, running wild with rights. Yokozuna enters and eats a dropkick. DOUBLE NOGGIN KNOCKER. Owen gets laid out with a clothesline, and the Side Winder gets three at 10:23 (continuous clock).
Fall #3: Owen and Yoko tease taking a walk but do the honorable thing and return to the ring when the Gunns start messing with their belts. Owen lures Bart to the outside, but nothing comes of it. Yokozuna challenges Billy to a test-of-strength as the match has slowed to a crawl after a solid second fall. Billy stomps on Yoko's foot and grabs an arm bar. Imagine if the WWF had penalties, like unsportsmanlike conduct. Whip to the ropes and Yoko with a clothesline. Owen and Yoko take turns working Billy over in the corner and cap it off with the good old fashion wish bone. If you were waiting for Yoko's patented rest hold, we finally get the nerve pinch here, 17 minutes since the first bell. Billy escapes with elbows and uses the hair to slam Yoko backwards to the canvas. Bart in with a series of clotheslines. Owen nails him from the apron and Yoko finishes with a sloppy belly-to-belly suplex at 18:36. That was not only anticlimactic, but made Billy and Bart look like a couple of geeks. The 2nd Fall was perfectly fine and had a few decent comedic spots, but the rest dragged. *3/4
Doink (the Clown) (w/ Dink) vs. Skip (w/ Sunny):
My brain hurts looking at the ring. Doink is so far beyond the expiration date, as is the midget sidekick. While the Body Donnas is hardly the worst gimmick, it's not doing much to get crowds worked up, except for pre-teen boys noticing a change in their body when Sunny is showcased. Doink gets pyro. I REPEAT. DOINK. GETS. PYRO. He clowns around with Danny Davis before the bell. Get it? CLOWNS AROUND? I wish I were dead, too. Skip shows off with jumping jacks, but Doink is unimpressed. Lockup and Skip with a hip toss, followed by push-ups. Whip to the ropes and Doink with an arm drag, hip toss, and slam before mocking Skip by doing push-ups with Dink on his back. Skip is so mad he staggers into a drop toe hold and caught in an arm bar. Skip takes control and chokes Doink across the top rope. He takes Doink over with a snap suplex and drops the leg for two. Whip to the corner, Doink avoids the charge and takes Skip over with a sunset flip for two. Skip remains in control, hooking a chin-lock. Doink escapes with elbows but runs into a knee. Skip with a snap mare and elbow to the top of the head for two. Doink fights out of another chin-lock. He connects with an inverted atomic drop and clothesline. Whip to the ropes and Doink with a hip toss, followed by a dropkick and back body-drop. Back slide for a two count. Inside cradle for two. Skip avoids a blind twisting body press and cradles Doink for three at 7:31. Tell me Skip's finisher isn't an inside cradle. Perfectly fine wrestling. **1/2
WWF Intercontinental Championship Match:
"Double J" Jeff Jarrett (c) vs. Savio Vega:
Three nights, three different challengers. I'm impressed. Once again, no Roadie at ringside for Double J. Jarrett doesn't waste time hiding in the ropes. Lockup into the corner, Jarrett takes a shot at Savio and gets knocked on his butt for doing it. Jarrett makes up for it, taking a cheap shot at Savio during another break in the corner. Whip is reversed and Savio with a hip toss, followed by a slam. Vega with mounted rights and Jarrett bails, milking it on the floor for a while. Jarrett picks the leg to gain an advantage, but Savio quickly fights him off, knocking him over the top rope with a clothesline. Savio stops him from taking a walk but ends up paying for it back in the ring. Jarrett slams him face-first into the canvas and takes him over with a snap suplex. Jarrett with a series of elbow drops and the Fargo strut. Savio teases a comeback, but Jarrett clips the knee with gusto and works over the leg. They're going a more methodical pace tonight. Vega counters a Figure-Four attempt with a small package for two. Jarrett pops up immediately and kicks the leg out from under. Vega blocks the Figure-Four again and rolls Double J up for another two count. Back suplex for two. Savio with right hands and the uranage. He gets himself fired up (insert Morales joke here) and boots Jarrett in the face for two. Whip and a side slam for two. NO ONE KICKS OUT OF DINO BRAVO'S OLD FINISHER! Jarrett tries taking a walk, but Savio stops him again. Despite being rolled in, Jarrett rolls back out, and Earl Hebner declares the count was never broken, and awards the match to Savio at 11:13. Whatever. Lame finish to a so-so match. *1/2
Shawn Michaels & Bam Bam Bigelow vs. Kama & Tatanka (w/ Ted Dibiase):
You know we're ready for the Main Event(s) of the night, because we've got a bunch of Corporation guys to look forward to! Kama and Tatanka attack from behind, knocking Shawn out of the ring. They double-team Bigelow, but he quickly hits a double DDT and Shawn comes back in with a flying clothesline on Tatanka. Bigelow and Tatanka start properly once things settle down. Bigelow does a tumble roll and mocks the War Dance. Funny how he used that as a heel, too. Crisscross and they botch a slam. Bigelow scoops him up again to complete the spot and misses a headbutt. Kama in with a series of right hands. Whip to the ropes and Bigelow with a back body-drop. Michaels gets tossed onto Kama, Rocket Launcher style. He takes a shot at Tatanka on the apron and mounts Kama in the corner for a flurry of rights. Whip across the ring is reversed, with Shawn flipping himself upside down on impact. Tatanka tags in and takes a crummy swinging neck breaker. Almost everything he's done has looked awful here. Bigelow with a series of shoulder tackles. He goes to the well once too often and goes over the top rope thanks to Kama pulling down the ropes. Back inside, Tatanka's poor performance continues with boots to the face that have few inches of space. Bigelow surprises him with an enzuigiri but Kama cuts off the hot tag and tosses him to the floor for more illegal shenanigans. Back inside, the Corporation controls doing little of note. Whip and Tatanka with a body press for two. He plants Bigelow with a DDT and comes off the top with a chop to the top of the head for two. I'm so bored, I'm trying to pronounce "Tatankama" without stuttering like an idiot. Bigelow hits them with a double clothesline and finally tags Shawn. He runs wild on Tatanka, hitting his signature diving forearm and a flying axe-handle for two. Whip to the corner and Shawn meets the post. Michaels avoids a clothesline, hits the Super-Kick, and Bigelow finishes with the diving headbutt at 12:33. Post-match, the Corporation works over Bigelow because he's a F'N geek until Shawn evens the odds. Match wasn't much, below expectations. *1/2
The Undertaker (w/ Paul Bearer) vs. Sycho Sid (w/ Ted Dibiase):
Final match of the night, insert substitution for Diesel comments here. The last time we recapped Undertaker vs. Sid was way back in April '92 when they were matched up on the UK Rampage Tour. They do the face-to-face stare. Sid goes for a cheap shot but Taker blocks and sends Sid out of the ring. Taker gives chase, but Sid's a cowardly heel. He puts the boots to Taker as he re-enters the ring. Taker quickly fights Sid off, sends him to the corner, and comes off the top rope with the tight-rope clothesline. Sid manages to hit a side slam, but Taker sits up. Sid ducks the diving lariat and knocks Taker out of the ring with a running boot. Back inside, Sid continues pounding away on Taker with his terrible right hands. Taker's comeback is cut short with a one-handed chokeslam. Sid with more clubbering in the corner. He sends Taker from one corner to the other and grabs a bearhug. Taker survives the brutal punishment of the hold and takes Sid down with a back suplex. Sid recovers first, putting the boots to Taker in the corner. He meets a boot on a charge and gets laid out with a clothesline. Taker scoops him up for the Tombstone, but Sid escapes and hits his own clothesline. Taker sits up and they trade blows. Taker ducks a clothesline and hits the diving lariat. The Tombstone connects but Tatanka runs in for the DQ at 11:15. Taker gives him a Tombstone for being a geek. Kama comes in now, and they do a 3-on-1 beating. This was awful. -*1/2
Final Thoughts: There was some intrigue based on the lineup with several unique matches featured, but all of them under-delivered (except for Taker/Sid, we all knew that one would suck). I wanted to like this, especially the 2 out of 3 Falls Tag Match, but sorry, it seemed like a lazy day at the office, and definitely not worth checking out.
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