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WCW World Championship Wrestling– October 27, 1990

by Scrooge McSuck

- This isn't just the go-home episode to Halloween Havoc '90, this is SIMULCAST along with it, because running first-run content opposite of your PPV is always a great move. To be fair, the only thing they advertised last week was the first-ever in-ring appearance (on free, or as free as Cable with TBS was) of EL GIGANTE. God, with that promise, I'd drop $19.95 on Halloween Havoc, too.

- Jim Ross and Bob Caudle are hosting from Center Stage.

The Southern Boys vs. Chuck Coats & Bill Ford:

How can the Southern Boys be here in Center Stage, and still work in Chicago in an hour?! Always good to see Scrap Iron Ford giving the fans obscene gestures. Jim Cornette joins the commentary to push a storyline that won't go very far. Smothers starts with Coats. Lockup to the ropes and Coats complains about pulling of the tights. Smothers with a fireman's carry into the arm-bar. Whip to the corner, Smothers takes Coats over with a back drop and hits him with a double thrust to the throat. Southern Boys with a double wrist-lock and short-clothesline. Armstrong with a dropkick and Smothers with a suplex for two. Ford comes in to try his luck and gets caught on the canvas with a variety of holds. Cornette calls the Armstrong family "The Addams Family" because they're a bunch of weirdos. Whip and Ford connects with a power-slam. Why is this match going so long? Armstrong quickly comes back with a sunset flip for two. Ford remains in control, taking him over with a suplex for a two-count. Whip to the ropes and Armstrong with a diving clothesline. Could you imagine putting on a match on Monday Night Raw or Smackdown where two locals were given this much time to work over a semi-pushed team. Armstrong and Smothers clean house (botching one of their big double team spots) and finally finish Coats with the scoop-up/flying back elbow combo at 7:34.

- Gordon Solie runs down the card for Halloween Havoc. It's the same lineup we've had for weeks, despite the undercard having quite a few substitutions. Why? Because it's LITERALLY THE SAME PROMO. How hard would it be to re-record some of these?

- Gordon Solie is standing by for the Wrestling Wrap-Up, recapping what is going to take place tonight on Halloween Havoc. We see highlights that lead us to Sting defending the World Heavyweight Title against Sid Vicious, including the attack at Clash of Champions XII and in Chicago on September 30th. Then we get highlights that set up Doom defending the World Tag Team Titles against Ric Flair and Arn Anderson (yes, it's heel vs. heel at this point).

Ricky Morton & Tommy Rich vs. Joe Cazana & The Italian Stallion:

One of my favorite reports in the history of the WON is the Italian Stallion setting a Guinness World Record for quickest time consuming a pound of spaghetti. As I type that, Jim Ross puts it over, and in this case, it was under 30-seconds. I'm sure he broke it a few years later. Morton starts with the Spaghetti Stallion. Ross notes the Freebirds are responsible for the injury to Robert Gibson. Whip and Morton with a hip toss, followed by an arm drag into a wrist-lock. The Cazana-Spaghetti Connection try trapping Morton in the corner, but he proves to be too elusive for them. Whip to the corner and Morton does the same with Cazana that he did with the Spaghetti Slob. Rich with more arm drags and an arm-bar on Cazana. Morton with a double leg drop across the midsection. If you like arm-bars, this is your kind of match. ANOTHER MATCH THAT IS GOING WAY TOO LONG. Stallion with a delayed suplex on Morton for as long as it takes him to eat a pound of spaghetti. Morton reverses a whip to the corner but meets the turnbuckle on a charge. So little is happening, we talk about how tall El Gigante is, not just in wrestling, but college basketball. I feel like that sport isn't exactly Jim Ross' forte. Morton finishes with a sunset flip on Cazana at 7:39. Next, please.

- The Fabulous Freebirds are standing by to hype tonight's PPV and their match against the Renegade Warriors. Michael Hayes closes saying every time a major WCW show has come to Chicago, a major title has changed hands. I say this because they aren't involved in a title match.

J.W. Storm vs. Terrence Blaylock:

Storm roars at the camera during introductions and gets a funny look from Cappetta for it. Storm hits Blaylock with a right hand and takes him down with a side slam. Whip is reversed, Storm ducks a clothesline, and bounces back with a dropkick. Blaylock with a surprise inside cradle for a near-fall. Whip and an elbow as Ross compared him to a football player. Snap suplex for a "two count" (he picked Blaylock off the canvas). Whip and a sloppy power-slam. Another whip and the choke grab and slam finishes at 1:44. At least it was short, but Storm is lacking finesse in the ring.

The Z-Man vs. Tom Burke:

The more I think about it, the more I realize how dumb a nickname "The Z-Man" is. Lockup and Z-Man grabs a side headlock. Whip to the ropes and he knocks Burke down with a shoulder tackle. Zenk grabs the arm and takes Burke over with a head-scissors. Zenk shows off his chain-wrestling skills before settling down with a side headlock takeover. Zenk with a hip toss and pair of dropkicks, sending Burke out of the ring for a breather. He's brought back into the ring via slingshot and Zenk drops a leg across the midsection. Lockup into the corner and Burke unloads with right hands, his first offensive flurry of the match. Snap mare into a chin-lock. God, NOT EVERY BABYFACE SQUASH NEEDS HEELS GETTING HEAT ON THE PUSHED TALENT. Zenk regains control with a front face-lock. Zenk with a knee to the midsection and another dropkick. We go back to the headlock because we need to fill two hours and have 60 minutes of content (so this is where they got the production model for 3-hour episodes of Raw). Whip to the corner and Zenk with a back suplex before finishing with the flying body press at 6:14. We get the "Nintendo Power Play" recap of the finish. At least we don't see anyone calling the spot or missing badly.

- Gordon Solie is standing by for a SECOND INSTALLMENT of the Wrestling Wrap-Up. This time we focus on the matches pitting Lex Luger and Stan Hansen over the US Championship, and the Steiner Brothers and Nasty Boys over the U.S. Tag Team Titles.

- The Halloween Havoc '90 commercial features Elvira. Not going to lie, I had a crush on her as a kid. It might've been her big hair.

Captain Mike Rotunda & Tim Horner vs. The State Patrol:

Oh boy, another match with the State Patrol. I don't think any of these men are booked for Halloween Havoc '90. Jim Ross notes that the Power Hour is going to be switching time-slots starting November 3rd. WCW having a confusing TV schedule? HA! Rotunda and Wright start. Wright with a side headlock and shoulder tackle. Crisscross and Rotunda (with an anchor on his butt) plants him with a slam. Horner comes in and goes to work on the arm. Ross calls Horner one of the most underrated athletes in wrestling. Parker comes in to help his partner, but Rotunda quickly evens the odds. Rotunda and Horner with a pair of dropkicks and double clotheslines to clear the ring. We return from a commercial break with nothing happening (a trend we've seen all night). Despite a poor win-loss record, Caudle puts the State Patrol over for their efforts against tough competition. Parker controls with a side headlock on Rotunda. The referee says some hair-pulling, forcing a break and allowing Captain Lightning to control with head-scissors. Horner with a snap-mare into a chin-lock. HOW DARE ROSS CALL THIS A "FAST-PACED MATCH." Earlier we had the arm-bar match, this is the head-scissors match. Ross tells us about a more interesting match last night on the Power Hour between Rotunda and Horner against Flair an Arn Anderson. To change it up, we get SYNCHRONIZED HEAD-SCISSORS. We're 10-minutes in, by the way. Wright complains about hair-pulling despite being bald. We get heel miscommunication and a short (pun intended) shoving match between the under-sized ex-officers. 13-minutes in and the State Patrol finally get to work Rotunda over for a bit (about 20-seconds). Horner fends off both opponents with ease and finishes Wright with the O'Conner Roll at 13:45 (shown). This was an absolute waste of time. Can we see the Halloween Havoc commercial with Elvira, again? ½*

- The Junkyard Dog and El Gigante are standing by to hype Gigante's first match on World Championship Wrestling... TV. I seriously have no idea what Gigante is doing, but this pose should reveal all the answers.

Allen Iron Eagle vs. Bob Andrews:

The hits keep on coming. Does Eagle have a little Warrior symbol on his tights?! Eagles doesn't waste time going to work on the left arm as the Renegade Warriors come to ringside for moral support. Eagle rides Andrews on the canvas until he scrambles for the ropes to force a break. Eagle with a pair of arm drags before hooking the arm-bar. Andrews side-steps Eagle, sending him to the floor. He gets frustrated because Andrews keeps booting him down while getting through the ropes. After three failed attempts, Eagle lays out Andrews with a big chop. Whip to the ropes and a double chop finishes at 3:28. Not short enough.

- Trucker Normis here to tell us about safe Trick-or-Treat tidbits.

Tommy Angel vs. Barry Horowitz:

What is going on with these garbage matches?! Angel's mullet is nearly out of control. Ross claims that Barry's brother, Murray, is Paul E. Dangerously's investment broker. "Another piece of useless trivia." I'll take his word for it. Lockup and Horowitz with a fireman's carry, followed by an arm drag. Angel comes back with a dropkick and arm drag of his own. Ross lets us know that Horowitz was the Freebirds mystery partner and scored the fall over Allen Iron Eagle in a Six-Man Tag advertised for last week's episode of Main Event. Crisscross and Horowitz with a side slam. Horowitz meets the corner on a failed charge. Angel unloads with shoulders to the midsection. Horowitz surprises him with an inverted atomic drop and finishes with the half-nelson cradle at 2:50. Horowitz is finishing guys quicker than the guys with real pushes?!?

- The Editor of the Wrestling Wrap-Up is standing by to present an award to The Southern Boys, a "Special Achievement Award" that is so poorly explained I don't even know how to describe it (it's basically for winning one match). We see old clips of the Southern Boys defeating the Midnight Express on an episode of Worldwide. By clips, I mean 5-MINUTES OF THE MATCH. We return to see the Southern Boys high-fiving each other on their victory. To the surprise of nobody, the presentation is interrupted by Jim Cornette, taking exception for being given an award to make him and the Midnight Express look like jerks. He says the match is six months old and a fluke, and calls Armstrong's father a bum and him (Steve) a never-will-be. Armstrong shoves Cornette on "his big fat a**" (the bleep inserted because TV edited it out, too) as we continue pushing a feud that will not go anywhere.

The Junkyard Dog & El Gigante vs. El Diablo & Kamikazi:

Everything about El Gigante feels like amateur hour. Both opponents are masked, wearing black. I'm sure both have been Black Scorpion's on the house shows, too. JYD starts, shoving Kamiazi around. I'm only guessing which one is which, since both are nondescript looking. Whip and YD with a shoulder tackle. followed by a headbutt. Gigante tags in, no-selling the offense of both scrubs and lays them out with clotheslines. JYD comes back in and sells for a few seconds for our mismatched opponents. He makes his own comeback and tags the giant back in. He whips Kamikazi to the ropes and boots him down for three at 2:46. I hope you enjoyed skipping Halloween Havoc for this TV debut for El Gigante.

Trucker Norm (w/ The Juicer) vs. Keith Hart:

After all these weeks, I just assumed Norman never wrestled as Trucker Norm. Hart attacks Norm with a running high knee. Whip to the ropes and Norm lays him out with a clothesline. Hart comes off the ropes for a shoulder tackle and that doesn't go well. Norm side-steps another charge, sending Hart to the floor, where Juicer harasses him with the dust from his hair. Where's the DQ, referee?! Back inside, Norm with a slam and dropkick. Whip to the corner, Norm follows in with an avalanche. Hart falls to the floor again, where he's greeted with SILLY STRING OF DOOM. In clear view of the referee. Back inside, Norm blocks a sunset flip with the seated splash and that's it at 1:55.

- Jim Cornette storms the set, claiming attempted murder. He's on medication and could've been killed. He says the Southern Boys are going to a lot of hospitals courtesy of the Midnight Express.

Final Thoughts: Since this show was running head-to-head with Halloween Havoc, it shouldn't be a surprise it was booked as such a nothing show. The wrestling ranged from bad to incredibly boring, and other than Cornette's promos at the end, there's nothing worth checking out unless you want to see Horner and Rotunda do 15-minutes worth of head-scissors.

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