WCW Thunder - October 27, 1999
by Erick Von Erich
The SIXTH Annaul DWS Halloween Havok lumbers on! This time, there's a storm brewing on the SuperStation, as we jump back to late October of the glorious year of 1999. Will this have absolutely any connection to Halloween?! My money's on "no", but maybe we'll get a random pumpkin graphic. Mike Tenay and Larry Zbyszko are our hosts, as we're coming from the Cox Center on the campus of San Diego State University (viva Tony Gwynn!!). According to Tenay this was been "one of the most intresting weeks in WCW history" as the "Powers That Be" have arrived. But with so much going on in World Championship Wrestling, let's get down to ringside for..
Juventud Guerrera vs. Evan Karagias
Ring announcer David Penzer announces this as a "return match" from Nitro; when Karagias got involved in a match with Madusa and MENG. Okay. Basic criss-cross (JUMP! JUMP) segment, as Juventud seems more concerned with wiggling his crotch to the crowd. Flying tilt-a-whirl head scissors from Juvi, then some chops and a missed splash into the corner. Karagias with 8,9,10...10 VUNDERFUL punches in the corner! More elementary stuff as they kinda' blow Juvi's little wheelbarrow into a bulldog move. Karagias reverses a vertical suplex and gets 2. Juvi sweeps the legs and delivers a crotch headbutt or "very South of the midsection" as Tenay puts it. Then...waitaminut, waitaminut...here's comes Sid Vicious to interrupt! Sid gets the house mic and brags about being "undfeated", conveniently forgetting about Halloween Havoc and his loss to Goldberg. Sid issues an open invitation to anybody in the back, so he can "cripple them". Chris Benoit answers the challenge, promising the "silence of violence", so I guess we're on for later tonight. Sid shakes the hands of Juvi and Karagias, then proceeds to clothesline and powerbomb both of them!
Backstage, "Mean" Gene Okerlund has tracked down the Maestro. Maestro proclaims himself the "stahhh of the show".
Elsewhere, Chavo Guerrero is looking for Goldberg, so he can "get some TV time". We hear Sid screaming in the background.
Prince Iaukea vs. The Maestro
Yes, this is happening. Maestro ducks under and poses for a bit, so Iaukea hits him with a drop-kick to the mush. They perform some decent mat and arm-wringer exchanges, until Maestro pummels Iaukea into the corner. Iaukea gets the upper hand (and boot. hey-oh), then a very choregraphed "sucker" move as Maestro trips him into the turnbuckle. Slappy/choppy for a bit, then Iaukea with a dropkick and backdrop for 2. Maestro comes off the rope with a kneelift, then hooks his "Encore" finisher, which is just an STF. Maestro slaps it on, again, atfer the bell to milk some boo-birds. Well, this was 100% forgettable.
El Dandy & Silver King vs. Dean Malenko & Perry Saturn (w/Shane Douglas)
But first, it was not that long ago (Nitro), when the Revolution --and specifically Asya-- abducted Torrie Wilson as part of their ongoing tiff with the Filthy Animals. All three Revolution members get the house mic and babble. The future Los Fabulosos then hit the ring to ...mild applause. Silver King boogies around and hits a DDT on Saturn. Then try a weak double-team leg takedown, then a double superkick. Malenko knees Silver King in the kidney and the Revolution takes over. Malenko with a leg lariat, then a a double-team "decapitation" move, but with Saturn coming off the top with a knee. Malenko takes Silver King outside and thumps him on the railing. Back in, Saturn lifts Silver King up for a suplex, allowing Malenko to connect with a flying bodypress in another nice double-team move. Malenko puts his head down, as Silver King kicks him and makes the en fuego tag to El Dandy, who comes off the top rope with a dropkick. Silver King tries a springboard plancha, outside on to Saturn, but it doesn't come off too well. Malenko lures El Dandy out, kicks him in the juevos, then blasts him with Shane Douglas's CHAIN BRACELET! Malenko tosses him back in and applies the Texas Cloverleaf for the submission win. I love EVIL Dean Malenko. They tried, but you knew the luchador contingent had no chance of winning.
Backstage, Chavo is still searching for Goldberg, as he's upgraded his efforts to now include OPENING DOORS!
Brought to you by 1-800-Collect, Jimmy (Faris?) calls in the Nitro Road Report, wishing us all a Happy Halloween Weekend. There it is-- the Halloween Reference!
Flashback to Monday Nitro, when J.J. Dillon told Sting that neither he nor Goldberg was the WCW World Champion, after the events of Halloween Havoc. In turn, the title has been vacated and we kicked off a 32 person tournament! Nitro wasted no time, as some first round matches took place. Norman Smiley upset Bam Bam Bigelow in a hardcore match! Perry Saturn defeated Eddie Guerrero after David Flair interfered. MENG easily defeated Madusa (yes, Madusa) and her two friends. Lex Luger beat Rick Steiner by countout after Jeff Jarrett accidentally brained Steiner with his guitar. The Filthy Animals exploded, as (Billy) Kidman pinned Konan after interference from...Harlem Heat? Okay. Sting pinned Brian Knobbs in less than a minute. David Flair beat on Diamond Dallas Page with a crowbar...no idea what the decision was, though. Then, in the main event of the evening, the United States Championship was also up for grabs as Bret Hart won the title and advanced over Goldberg...with the necessary outside interference from Sid Vicious, Kevin Nash and Scott Hall. Huh. This would be an interesting tournament to go back and recap, someday.
"Mean" Gene is backstage with Stevie Ray and Booker T. Stevie shouts some fightin' words at that fruit booty, Curly Bill! We also get footage of the Revolution leaving the arena and entering their rental car. Okay.
Sting shills the WCW Mastercard, "the card to go to the mat for!"
"Mean" Gene interviews Curly Bill. He runs down Curt Hennig, saying that he's no longer a member of the West Texas Rednecks.
Stevie Ray (w/Booker T) vs. Curly Bill
I guess they're both heels. Stevie pounds away on Bill while Booker T joins the broadcast team. Big slam, but Stevie misses a slowwwww elbowdrop. Bill fights back, but quickly tries to attack Stevie's boot with his jaw. Outside, where Stevie dumps him on the broadcast table. Booker feigns concern in a mildy funny moment. Back in, where Stevie just pounds away some more, then delivers a side-suplex slam (NOT a "sidewalk slam"). A random ref bump, so Bill takes the opportunity to grab his cowboy boot and blast Stevie. Ref's still out, so Booker T runs in and hits Bill with the Harlem Sidekick. Stevie plants Bill with his flapjack double underhook to get the pin. Yes, somebody felt this turd of a match needed a ref bump and outside interference.
Backstage, the Filthy Animals have arrived. Okay, I know it's all kayfabe, but shouldn't it be that all wrestlers are there at the start of the show? Isn't that when they all supposedly see who's on the card and who wrestles when? This is sort of like your punter getting to the stadium at the start of the second quarter.
Eddie Guerrero, Billy Kidman & Konan (w/Rey Mysterio) vs. Steven Regal, Dave Taylor & Chris Adams
All four Filthy Animals get the mic before the match...and it's terrible. Eddie says it's "not God Save the Queen. It's God Save Your Ass". Rey has a message for the Revolution: "we will f*ck you like the dogs you are". Eddie and Taylor start, in a decent back-and-forth of drop-kicks and flying head scissors. Tag-offs to Konan and Adams, respectively. Adams does a handspring out of an armbar, then falls victim to Konan's somersault clothesline. Gut-kick and DDT from "K-Dawg". Evil British Guys take over, momentarily, then it's Kidman vs. Regal. Regal goes for a double underhook suplex, but Kidman floats him over with an armdrag. Kidman hops up on Regal's shoulder, but gets guillotined on the top rope. Nice vertical suplex from Taylor and a low-blow superkick from Adams. Adams and Kidman fight over a piledriver/backdrop for a spell. All 3 stomp a krumpet into Kidman, until Adams misses a top-rope kneedrop. Eddie comes in to clean house, then it's a 6-man brawl spilling out to ringside. Eddie plants Taylor with a suplex, then goes upstairs for the Frog Splash and the 3 count. Not bad, but again, there was no real drama.
Backstage, Chavo's on a cell-a-phone, while "Mean" Gene tries to interview Berlyn and his bodyguard, The Wall. Berlyn talks about all those "other unclean people out there" and declares he has a master plan underway.
Lash LeRoux vs. Chavo Guerrero
LeRoux gets the house mic and promotes his upcoming Monday Nitro World Heavyweight Championship tournament match against The Cat, Ernest Miller. "Laissez le bon temps rouler! I guar-on-teee". Making me nostalgic for Cajun Spice Ruffles Potato Chips. Chavo makes his entrance and, of course, grabs the house mic, asking for Goldberg. Lash attacks from behind (so much for being the babyface),stomps him into the corner then plants him with a slam and an elbowdrop. They fight over an armdrag and Chavo climbs up on Lash's shoulders to turn it into a hurracanrana. Belly to back suplex gets 2 for Chavo. A chinlock happens. Side backbreaker gets 2 for Lash. Chavo reverses a suplex attempt into a cradle for another 2. Lash gets two pinning attempt then another chinlock happens. Sloppy umm...kneelift or hiptoss from Lash, then he tries to pry out Chavo's teeth. They hit the ropes and Chavo doesn't get enough elevation from Lash to hit his drop-kick correctly. Reverse elbosmash gets 2 for Chavo, then Lash turns a waistlock into a Northern Right suplex. Chavo a charge into the corner, so Lash it quick to lift him up for his version of a Death Valley Driver and that gets the 3 count for the "Cajun Sensation". Was good at times, but the rest holds and the lame drop-kick and hip-toss spots hurt the quality.
Cut to the bakck, where Billy Kidman and Konan are using the "Kid Cam" (which, miraculously is tied into the TV feed) to film Buff Bagwell talking to ...Scotty Riggs? Damn if I can understand what they're saying.
Back from commercial, we see a LIMO arriving and out steps... a buncha' yaks and Ernest "The Cat" Miller.
Berlyn (w/The Wall) vs. "Lightning Foot" Jerry Flynn (w/Jimmy Hart)
Okay, so I'm billing him as "The Wall", but I don't think they've announced his name on TV, yet, as he's just "Berlyn's Bodyguard". Lynn was a guy whom I forgot about on a weekly basis in the late 90's. He's cut his mullet and has a buzzcut, making him look like the lovechild of Steve Blackman and Bob Holly. Flynn acts "distracted" by a ring rope or something, allowing Berlyn to attack right away and take him down with a headlock. Armbar battle, as Flynn flips over and lands a reverse thrust kick to the mush. To the ropes and Berlyn hits a monkeyflip and a drop-kick. Uppercuts and a leg lariat and Berlyn makes a loafing, non-chalant, cover for 1. German supplex gets another 1. Berlyn misses an elbow, so Flynn Sweeps the Legs. Few more kicks from Flynn, as Jimmy Hart gets up on the apron. "The Boydguard" pulls him down and knocks him to the ground. Flynn misses a charging kick and crotches himself on the top rope, so The Bodyguard hops up and punches him. THAT gets the 3 count for Berlyn. Egads. Oh wait, nobody grabbed the house mic before the match?! What gives?!
Chavo is STILL looking for Goldberg, backstage. This time, he finds SID and gets shoved into a stack of crates.
Ernest "The Cat" Miller (and his yaks) come to ring for a promo. Through his tenure, Miller couldn't decide if he was a heel or face, as he'd act funny but tell "all you rednecks to shut up". Anyways, he says he's going to win the World Championship Tournament, cuz' he's the greatest and that's about it. He concludes by saying he's going to win the championship on Monday night. Ummm... the first round just kicked off.
Backstage, Buff Bagwell walks down a hallfway and opens a door!
Back from commercial, "Mean" Gene is with Chris Benoit, who cuts a promo on Sid Vicious and also Dean Malenko; his upcoming opponent in the big tournament.
Buff Bagwell vs. Scotty Riggs
We get a recap of Bagwell's recent history of doing deliberate jobs for "the two idiots in the back". Bagwell purposely slouches around and gets caught in a full Nelson. Headlock takeover from Bagwell to continue the slow pace. Things speed up as they hit the ropes and Riggs lands a drop-kick. Bagwell allows a single-leg takedown and Riggs works on the knee. Flying bodypress from the top gets 2 for Riggs. Bagwell complains about something, then kicks Riggs and pins him with a small package. Bagwell's music doesn't play, as the storyline is that he's doing everything to spite the bookers. I can't remember if this storyline ever escalated or had a pay-off.4
Chris Benoit vs. Sid Vicious
Y'know, not a terrible choice for a main event. Lock-up and Sid powers Benoit into the corner, then whips him to the ropes for a clothesline. More thumping and Sid tosses Benoit onto the top turnbuckle. Sid turns to gloat to the fans and turns around to eat a flying drop-kick. 2 count cover, but Sid bench-presses Benoit through the ropes and to the floor. They return to the ring and miss a spot where Sid's knee was supposed to be drop-kicked by Benoit. The Crippler goes after the knee, but Sid's power gives him the advantage. Back outside, where Sid slams him on the railing and the obligatory toss-to-the-ringsteps. In the ring, Sid gets a 2 count and slaps on his version of the Cobra Clutch into a slam. To the ropes and Sid lands the Big Boot. Punchy/kicky and Benoit sells like mad. Sid with a seated reverse chinlock, then a side back-breaker for 2. Another slam, but also for 2. Benoit ducks a clothesline off the ropes and connects with the German suplex! Benoit goes up top for the diving headbutt....but Sid rolls away. Crippler Crossface is applied, outta' nowehere! Suddenly, the Revolution hits the ring, drawing the disqualification. Sid's pissed, so he powerbombs Perry Saturn, Dean Malenko AND Benoit. The Filthy Animals return, brawling with the Revoluton in the aisle. Double feuds like this always bugged me (Revolution vs. Benoit and Revolution vs. Filthy Animals). We're outta' time!
Why'd You Watch This?
As part of their new booking regime, WCW and their performers were more concerned with their promos than the wrestling. Every segment had whacky shenanigans and sub-par mic work; making them look like "WWF Lite". It's like the performers were told to just sleepwalk through some moves, but really concentrate on gabbing on the mic. WCW's strength was (usually) the wrestling and everything else was secondary. It's pretty much accepted that the "Powers That Be" era was terrible and this only confirms that.
Dammit...there wasn't even a substanial Halloween reference! Screw this show.
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